


Grammar School

by HissyTheDangerNoodle



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: 1970s, F/M, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Magical prejudice, Mild Language, Misogyny, Period Typical Attitudes, Period-Typical Homophobia, Period-Typical Racism, Period-Typical Sexism, Smoking, Threats of Violence, fantasy slurs, implied/referenced racism (not graphic not glorified)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-01
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:07:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 27,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24495451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HissyTheDangerNoodle/pseuds/HissyTheDangerNoodle
Summary: When Minerva McGonagall appears at Spinners End she does not give the eleven year old half blood there a good impression of Hogwarts, so he doesn't go. Not when he has a better options.#TransLivesMatter #BlackLivesMatter
Relationships: Petunia Evans Dursley/Severus Snape
Comments: 91
Kudos: 308





	1. Eleven Plus

The knock at the door nearly made him jump out of his skin in his haste to get up and answer it. They had been expecting the visitor all day and his head was still swimming with the choice before him. She was a tall Scotch woman who introduced herself with a brogue that instantly made Severus want to know if she had a cold or had just put a cig out. He only ever heard accents like that when dad took him to the pub on a Saturday for a glass of coke and a bag of pork scratchings while they watched the rugby and the labourers were in.   
  
"You are _Severus_ Snape?" He nodded and clambered out of her way, immediately put off by the way she looked down her nose at his home. She didn't have to make it so obvious that she was judging them. "I am professor Mcgonogall, deputy headmistress of Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry. You received my owl and should have been expecting me?"   
  
"Course were expectin' you woman, or else the kid ud know better than to open't door to ye." Severus winced at how rough his father's tone was. "Come in sit down, yer making place look untidy." Well at least dad was being polite even if she was interrupting Colombo. "Yer ere to offer im place at that fancy school of yours?"   
  
"Yes, mister Snape, I presume?"  
  
"Aye _Lassie_ ," the put on accent didn't seem to amuse her and he dropped it, "And what've you got that local grammar can't do better? Boy passed is eleven plus, could go uni, be summa special."  
  
"He is something special, Mister Snape, your son is a _wizard_."  
  
Tobias snorted and lit a cigarette. The cloud only joined the haze that had hung over the room since morning.   
  
"Hogwarts is a fine institution turning out world class witches and wizards capable of-"  
  
"Ow many of em can put food pon table, shoes on feet… our Eileen said you don't even sit O levels there. So young un wud come out thick as two short planks."   
  
"And on what basis have you made that assumption, Mister Snape?" She seemed personally offended that her precious school was being held in such low esteem by a muggle. Severus exchanged a glance with his mum and had to bite a lip to stop himself laughing. Dad thought magic was stupid and useless for anything but fancy tricks.  
  
"Our Eileen ere can barely work a telly, or a cooker. Can't even get erself a job sewin or cleaning she's so useless as your education gave her graces."   
  
"Are you declining the place for your son, mister Snape?"  
  
"I'm saying you ain't offering him any good reason to go up to her fancy castle," he jutted a thumb at his wife, "and learn how to make fireworks."   
  
"Hogwarts is a fine-"  
  
"Professor?" Severus finally blurted out and immediately regretted it when they all turned to him. "Passing my eleven plus... it's a big thing, I got offered a full scholarship, they'll even help pay for my uniform and other bits. My mum's told me about magic and, well… what are my real options?"   
  
"Well that depends entirely on where your skills lay, young man."   
  
"I've read those books, potions looks interesting, and transfiguration looks dead clever and full of numbers but why bother with astronomy? I could learn most of it at a normal school and not have to be up half the night."  
  
"If you were a competent brewer you might be a potions master-"  
  
Tobias snorted.  
  
" _Glorified chemist_."  
  
"Transfiguration could lead to careers with the Ministry or Gringotts…"  
  
"Government and bank? Look around you miss, I'd be lynched if I came back here and said I worked for either."  
  
"Severus! Have some respect." Eileen shrieked even as Tobias chuckled darkly.  
  
"I could go off to uni and be a doctor, or apprentice as an engineer or anything here. Even my mum couldn't think of anything that sounds like it's something I'd want to do." Severus admitted. Mum had said he'd be a Slytherin, she was convinced he'd be brilliant at potions and defence, but he'd rather starve before he became an auror and that was really all there was.  
  
"How could you possibly know if you do not try?" The woman looked lost and slightly concerned that Severus wasn't biting her hand off for the offered chance to go to Hogwarts. Maybe last month he would have done, but his eleven plus result had changed things. Dad had been proud of him for once. Dad had been sober for days and had started talking about buying sports kits and uniforms. Dad had promised to stay sober so it wouldn't wreck Severus's chances at school if he went. They had bought him an _honest-to-god_ man's watch with a real leather strap and gold hands. He hadn't known dad had the money for that and the suit for his school interview that had come with a haircut not done by mum in the living room but by a real barber.  
  
"You're asking me to give up my life, most of my friends are muggles, my dad's a muggle, for what? The chance to work in an office? I've got that here."  
  
"To study and perform magic!"  
  
"Like I don't do that already, there's no law that says I can't save up and buy my own wand and learn at home is there?"   
  
"Well, no, but your mother's instruction would be limited and books-"  
  
"You sent me a list with a dozen books on it." Severus cut in impatiently. "I read most of them years ago because they're the same ones mum's got. So why am I going all the way to Scotland to learn what's in my bedroom upstairs?"   
  
"Do you not have any friends who are also magical? Would you not wish to join them?"  
  
Severus hesitated for a moment and then snorted.  
  
"One muggle born friend and me a Slytherin, yeah, sounds like that'll work out." He said cuttingly. He hadn't wanted to admit it but they were just too different. Lily's parents were rich, she wanted to go to Hogwarts, she'd fit in a lot better than he would in his mum's old robes and dad's old work boots in winter.  
  
"And what makes you so sure you will be a Slytherin, young man?" Severus shot a questioning look at his mum who seemed to draw herself up to full height.  
  
"Because he is a Prince, and I know my boy, he's a Slytherin to the core." Severus smiled slightly. Mum always said that like she was proud of him for it but this woman didn't seem impressed.  
  
"Well, _young_ mister Snape," dad snorted at the deliberate attempt to make him not say anything, "which will it be, life as a wizard, or life as a muggle?" And that, right there, made his mind up for him. The cheek of her giving him an ultimatum like that. The way her tone dropped with derision and she glanced at dad when she said muggle like it was dirty. He crossed his arms over his chest, looked at her coolly and set his jaw as he decided he didn't like her.  
  
"I'm going to grammar school, and I'll buy me own wand and teach meself when I'm ready, _lady_."   
  
They all seemed surprised by his pronouncement, dad laughed and hit the arm on the chair as if his team had scored a touch in the rugby on the radio, mum gasped and the woman just looked a bit like he'd put her nose out of joint for her.   
  
"And you can tell Lily that if she knows what's good for her she'll go to the secondary modern and not bother with a world where you'll treat her like dirt because her parents are muggles."  
  
" _We do no such thing_!" The woman hissed at him and Severus stared at her. Had it really been that easy to provoke her? Even with a drink in him dad didn’t provoke that easily.  
  
"Of course you don't professor, any more than I'll be treated like dirt for not being a rich kid with a plum in his mouth in September, but at least no one is asking me to forget who I am and where I come from." Dad was still laughing, mum started apologising. Severus rolled his eyes. "Don't apologise for me, mum, I'm not sorry I don't think muggles aren't worthless."   
  
"I did not say-"  
  
"You didn't have to, your expression when you looked at my _dad_ , and my _home_ , and me did it for you professor." He didn't stick about to hear how mum got out of that one.


	2. Paths Diverge

“Severus! You were right my parents are so excited Professor McGonagall came up the house and explained it all and-” her face fell slightly when she realised he wasn't smiling. “Why aren't you excited, we're off to Hogwarts!”

“You’re off to Hogwarts, I turned it down.” He said bluntly.

“Wha-Why?” He watched Petunia walking up behind her sister wearing a scowl and rolled his eyes.

“Because…” did he have a duty to tell her the ugly truth about blood and houses and old families? How mum had told him to watch out for Dumbledore and to mind Slughorn didn't try to use him for his skill? About how her family might try to hurt him for being a half blood if they had someone at the school and realised who he was…? “Because… I'm going to grammar school, and I'm going to take O levels. Me dad's talking about university already, you know, money wise.”

“But Seeev-” Lily tried to wheedle and he was suddenly struck by the childishness of her. There was something in Petunia’s expression as he said that, she wasn’t sneering at him for once. It was weird.

“I’m not going, Lily, I don’t like that woman and I don’t want to pretend to be something I ain't.”

“You’re going to grammar school!” She declared as if that was an argument. “You!” As if he wasn’t good enough to go to grammar school. It made him want to ask her what she was doing being his friend if she didn't think he could do it. That was the kind of reaction he expected from Petunia, not Lily, who he noted had yet to say a word.

“On a scholarship, and dads already warned me to watch out for bigger lads taking issue with me not being posh and not to let it get to me.”

“But-What does your mum think? She’s a witch!” Lily's eyes shone with triumph for a moment thinking she'd caught him.

“I don’t care what she thinks, or dad, I’m doing this for me. I’m still allowed to get a wand, just got to save up for it.”

“Are they expensive?” The sudden worry made his heart twang, he’d never heard Lily even once talk about money before, she just didn’t think about it the way he did. It passed. Severus snorted.

“Not to you two, your Dad went to grammar school. Must’ve done to be a proper doctor now.” Severus shrugged, ignoring Lily’s blush and Petunia's smirk at her sister suddenly realising that magic clearly couldn’t just make everything perfect.

“Is that why you don’t want to go? Can’t your parents afford it?” She leaned in conspiratorially and asked as if it would be shameful and Severus was immediately offended. He wasn’t ashamed of being poor, dad had always worked hard and they never went cold or hungry especially now that he was sober. What a difference a month made.

“Don’t be stupid, Girl, Hogwarts is free! I’m just not interested in not getting a proper education.”

She gave him the most contemptuous look and Petunia actually nodded at him. He had to look twice he was so surprised.

“Your sound like your dad; happy to be just another muggle!”

“And you sound like you’ll fit right In with the snobs and rich kids at Hogwarts, don’t forget to tell them who your parents are!” He told her nastily and with no guilt whatsoever. “See how much you like Hogwarts then!” She ran off after shouting at him that he was just mean and she’d show him. It hurt a bit, but he had known it would go something like that with Lily. She had been counting on having him to help her fit in, which was laughable really but he could see why.

He’d almost forgotten Petunia was there until he looked up.

“Well? Why are you still here?”

“For what it’s worth,” she said, “I think you did the right thing.” And ran before he had chance to reply.

-

When Lily showed up at the door the next day Severus nearly fell over. She’d never come this way in her life, he couldn’t even say he had thought she knew where he lived.

“What are you doing here?”

“I didn’t want to go to Hogwarts arguing with you, Sev.”

He sighed.

“Severus, who is it?”

“It’s just Lily mum, question about Hogwarts.” He lied easily.

“Well invite her in then, can’t have her stood in the doorway like a Mormon.” Tobias called out and the television was turned down even as Severus gestured absently to let her in. She was looking around curiously, expression kept carefully neutral and he didn’t ask what she thought. He’d seen the Evans House, this place was squalor in comparison even though it was clean since mum had started using magic for it.

“So, how can we help ye lass?” Dad asked from the armchair and Lily glanced at Severus. She was a terrible liar.

“Her parents were wondering about the exchange rate from our money to magic money,”

“ _Magic_ money,” Tobias repeated a little scornfully

“At the moment dear it is around a crown a galleon,” Eileen said from the doorway to the kitchen. Severus blinked, he hadn’t realised it was that much.

“And how much do I need, for everything?”

“I assume your parents will buy you everything new, my father did,” Eileen said and Severus forced himself not to comment that it was a shame she couldn’t have afforded to do that for her own kid, “it was about a two hundred and fifty galleons for the basic first year kit.”

Severus felt his gut churn, glad he hadn’t accepted the Hogwarts place now, no way mum and dad could have afforded that. His kit for the grammar school was a quarter of that and though they hadn’t said Severus wasn’t stupid he knew they were struggling even with the financial help from the school.

“How much is that in m-” Lily shot a wary look at dad, “normal money,”

“Bout twelve undred,” Severus muttered, mum wasn’t good with muggle money she didn’t understand it.

“Pounds!” Lily half shrieked, “Oh wow, that’s… a lot!”

“That it is lass.”

“Was there anything else?” Severus asked pointedly and Lily flushed.

“Well… I was… I wanted to ask you a favour Severus,” she said quietly and dad immediately turned his attention back to the TV.

“Oh?”

“Well, you know that copy of Hogwarts; A history you showed me?”

“What about it?” He asked blankly. He was surprised she remembered it.

“Could I borrow it? To show my parents? I’ll make sure you get it back it's just that they're really nervous about me going and I thought they could get an idea and maybe be less-” Severus shot a look at his mum.

“Not my book Lils, it’s mum’s. You’ll have to ask her.”

Eileen tilted her head.

“It’s a little outdated dear, you wouldn’t get the most recent updates.”

“Has much changed?” Lily asked carefully

“I would imagine so since Headmaster Dippet retired and professor Dumbledore took over. Headmasters do tend to change the tone of the school?”

“Oh?” Severus couldn’t help himself, he was curious.

“Well headmaster Dippet was a Ravenclaw, and Professor Dumbledore was a Gryffindor in his school days, and headmasters are always slightly partisan.” Eileen explained. “So the atmosphere changes, sometimes drastically.”

“I don’t understand?”

“Well, I would not have sent you or Severus to that school under headmaster Black, let’s put it that way, shall we?” Mum clearly didn’t know Lily.

“Why?” She asked, obviously enthralled.

“Come into the kitchen dears, leave Toby to his formula one.” Eileen led them through and Lily nudged Severus, frowning in question. Severus pointedly Closed the kitchen door.

“Because we’re not purebloods Lily, and the Blacks are… old fashioned.” Severus said before mum could.

“I don’t understand… Why does it matter?”

“It doesn’t dear, not to anyone with any sense, but people can be… cruel.”

“I still don’t… it’s not bad now is it?”

“Back then it was a bit like a black kid going to our school in the fifties,” Severus muttered. Lily lost all colour and Severus heard himself backtrack wildly “but you won’t be beaten up or anything at Hogwarts now,”

“Severus you’re scaring the poor girl, sit down, dear… it’s not easy to explain.”

Eileen spent about ten minutes explaining far more gently than she had ever explained to her son.

“Is… is that why you decided not to go, Severus?” Lily asked and Severus glared at his mum.

“I decided not to go because that McGonagall woman is a snob and I don’t want to turn down the chance at a proper life.” Severus said. “But I’m not you, you'll probably be a Ravenclaw and be fine.”

“You could be!” Lily shot back.

“Lily, mum and her family have been Slytherins for ten generations, and with a Gryffindor headmaster,” he was glad he hadn’t known that before or he’d have never entertained the woman even coming here, the feud between Gryffindor and Slytherin was legendary, “And I’ll bet that McGonagall woman is too by the way she looked at me, I don’t want to be a half blood in Slytherin, not now I’ve got a better option.”

“What’s so bad about being a half blood Slytherin?” Lily asked and Severus tried not to roll his eyes.

“Nothing!” Eileen cut in and glared at her son. “Some of the best Slytherin students are half bloods,”

“Yeah, bet that goes down well,” Severus muttered, “remember that story Lily, that Slytherin didn’t want kids with muggle parents at Hogwarts? It’s in the book.”

Lily nodded, her eyes widening with understanding.

“What do you think they’d think of me? Son of a witch who married a muggle.”

“You make them sound like… racists or something.”

“Yeah,” Severus said quietly, thinking of the way the woman had looked at his dad and him, “I do, don’t I?”


	3. New Schools

September 1971

The first day of school wasn’t as bad as he’d expected, dad had somehow softened on magic and mum had shown him a few good spells for his clothes. She’d smiled when he’d borrowed her wand and practised them on some of his usual stuff and it had worked the first time he did. Even dad was curious and had run his fingers over the smoothness of his Sunday trousers. Mum had decided it was a good idea to learn a spell that would keep his clothes clean and protect them from minor tears, bumps and scratches. Severus could take a punch but he still asked mum if the spell could help protect him as well but mum had better for that. She seemed to realise that dad had scared him with the comment about rich boys being brutal.

He’d been glad for the spell later, it had given him a confidence he didn’t know he had to face down four boys from fourth form at lunchtime, and to ignore snickers about his accent every time he spoke, but he hadn’t backed down and by the end of the day he had a couple of new friends and the fourth form boys were talking about the scrappy little first former with nerves of steel. It was quite funny actually, even dad thought so, judging by the way he laughed at the story over dinner. Mum seemed relieved, not least because she'd cooked his favourite toad in the hole and for once it was right, which instantly clued him in that she had used magic to do it. He wondered if dad knew she had. He'd always drawn the line at anything he was eating being spelled before- out of some strange idea that it might harm him.

The new school had houses- although they seemed to be random which student went where and not half as interesting as the ones at Hogwarts, at least not to him but mum was fascinated.

“It’s really simple, it works just like you told me Hogwarts does,”

“Speaking of, owl at the window while you were at school today,” Tobias commented, “looks like a letter from that girlfriend of yours.”

“She’s not me girlfriend, da!” Severus declared hotly, flushing at the thought, he’d never considered Lily that way. Dad laughed.

“And your school houses, Severus, what are they called?”

Severus shrugged.

“Snot that interesting mum, just Greek letters. Alpha, Beta, Delta, Kappa, Omega, Rho. I got put in Alpha.”

“Oh, do they mean anything…?” Eileen asked quietly and Severus tilted his head.

“Not really mum, they just are, thought apparently all the scholarship kids get put in Alpha, I got my badge look.” He pointed to an enamel pin badge in the shape of the Greek Alpha symbol on his blazer lapel.

“Oh, because at Hogwarts it’s more than that, your house is your family.” Severus wasn’t sure why mum was talking about Hogwarts, he wasn’t at Hogwarts. It was a bit irritating actually.

“And at school my house is the other kids with the same badge, who come from the same few schools and my house Captain is Parr in upper sixth, he’s a lawyer’s son. Seems alright. They try and make it like family, we compete in sports and competitions.”

“Any omework tonight?” Severus blinked, the last time his dad had asked him about homework he’d been six.

“Not today, didn't really have proper classes today, it'll pick up as I go along.” Tobias nodded. “My timetable is weird though, I'm learning French and German for some reason, oh, and there's a Latin class after school on a Thursday, can I sign up?”

“Latin, why?”

“Lot of spells in Latin, dad, and if I decide to be a lawyer or doctor it’ll be good to have.”

“How much is it?”

“No charge,” Severus answered promptly, he had double and triple checked the form, he wasn’t about to ask them to lay out more money after the cost of his uniform even with the scholarship.

“What times it finish?”

“Six, I’d be home by half past.”

“Be coming home in the dark in winter.” Tobias commented

“I know, it’s alright, it’s not that far.” Severus answered hopefully and glanced at his mum.

“Thursday’s?”

“Yeah,”

“If it’s dark I’ll meet you and walk back, don’t want you wondering round here in a posh uniform on yah own.”

Severus knew better than to argue with his dad when he was getting what he wanted, he glanced at mum and she nodded.

“Thanks dad!” Tobias laughed at him, there couldn’t be many kids grateful to be given more classes from round here.

“Anything else you wan sign up for?”

“Lot of different sports, was going to try for a first form team, maybe rugby or boxing?”

“Don’t see why not, you know I box' at school.” Yes, Severus knew. He knew because when he’d come home from primary school complaining of being bullied dad had taught him to throw a proper punch and he'd put the boy twice his size in hospital. It had been a better prospect than going home and telling dad he hadn't.

“Don’t be taking on too much Severus, you don’t know how hard the work is going to be yet.”

“I know mum, but two things isn’t much.”

“So tell us about this new frein of yours, Steve wasit?”

“Yeah, he dun't live far from here actually, turned off on the lane walking back. He went to the church of England primary school. Seems alright...”

-

_Dear Severus,_

_You were right, I can’t believe how beautiful Hogwarts is! You should have come, you would have loved it._

He rolled his eyes and scanned down the page absently looking for where she stopped waxing lyrical about floating candles. It wasn’t like a hover charm was complicated, he'd got it right with mums wand when he was eight.

_I was sorted into Gryffindor._

No surprises there then.

_I told the owl to wait for a reply from you seeing as you don’t have one of your own. Please write back, I miss you._

She had been there less than a week, she can’t have missed him that much considering she had barely written half a page.

Severus reached for a notebook, tore out a few pages, found his fountain pen and started writing.

_Dear Lily,_

_Hogwarts sounds pretty interesting, you don’t have to tell owls to wait- wizards at the post office, remember?_

_I had my first day at school today, mum and dad grilled me something chronic when I got home. We have a house system like at Hogwarts, but it's Greek letters and I'm in Alpha House. The buildings are really old style, someone said Gothic, and the chapel survived Cromwell! I think it must have been a monastery at some point or something. They say it's random how you go but one of the older boys said they only say that to make the boys in Rho feel better about having their parents buy their way in because they failed the entrance exam. What's Gryffindor like? The boys in my class are alright, we take classes in houses so it's probably a good idea that they put all the scholarship boys in Alpha so we don't get picked on by the rich kids for our accents too much. A few fourth formers tried to corner me at lunch, I told mum and dad they were second formers though didn't want them panicking, it's not like I can't take it, is it?_

_Do you know what classes you have yet? Mum always said transfiguration is really hard, but she's not good with numbers so that's probably why. I've got German tomorrow, and they said I could do Latin after school so that starts Thursday. Are you joining any clubs? Apparently gobstones is fun. My school has a chess club at lunchtimes I might join._

_Any way, got to go now, I want to read mum’s old potions book._

_Severus_

-

By Friday Severus was more exhausted than he had ever been in his life, he was also happier than he had ever been in his life. For the first time ever the classes were hard, he wasn’t sat there breezing through the work and twiddling his thumbs. German turned out to be better than he'd expected although he still didn’t get why he was learning a language they only spoke in one country, and Latin had been hilariously easy. Mum’s old spellbooks meant that he knew, or could guess, far more of the simple words than anyone else who had signed up.

He’d shone in chemistry, and the teacher made him laugh- he was probably the only one who liked the poor bloke. He was crabby and had opened his lesson with a dire warning that anyone who didn’t at least do the work shouldn't bother coming to the lessons. It was a welcome break from the wide eyed patronising hopefulness of the English teacher who wanted them to believe she gave a damn about them as individuals. Maybe she did but Severus didn't see it. Teachers like that cared about the good looking and obedient students, not kids like him who asked questions and questioned the answers.

He slept late Saturday morning, for him, but he was still awake and doing his homework by ten. Mum brought him a bit of breakfast at eleven.

“You got another letter from Lily, Severus, why don’t you take a break from all of that and reply to her?”

“Let me just finish this mum, and I will.” Severus answered absently.

“You haven’t been outside all week after school, or looked at any of my old books, Severus, it’s not like you.” Mum tried again and Severus set down his pen impatiently.

“Mum, I have a lot of homework, I don't want my teachers thinking I'm some kind of idiot or that I'm lazy. And I literally spent all last night looking at the cure for boils and the theory of the transfiguration spell for turning a match into a needle.” She instantly brightened. “And where am I going to go? Lily is at Hogwarts, I don't really have other friends who aren't just ask neck deep in work as I am.”

“You never used to need to be with anyone to go explore the wood or go to the park,”

“I still don't, I just don't want to. This is my chance mum, I'm not going to waste it.”

-

**_SEVERUS SNAPE!!_ **

He blinked at Lily’s usually neat cursive turned to block capitals that took up the entire first line of the page. He hadn’t known before that it was possible to shout in writing without using a howler.

_Are you OK The fourth formers didn't beat you up did they? I know it's illegal to hex muggles but we learned the Jelly Legs Jinx in duelling club this week. The incantation is Locomotor Wibbly, no wonder people get jelly legs laughing at that. It's total nonsense isn't it?_

Severus laughed aloud, he’d been practising something like that spell without a wand for years and most certainly didn’t need a girl running to his defence even if she was a Gryffindor now.

_There’s a boy in my house and he’s really annoying Sev, he keeps going on and on about flying. I’m scared. We have our first flying lesson tomorrow and the idea of going that high it's not like jumping off a swing is it?_

_I thought you said potions would be fun? The teacher doesn’t like me. I don't know why he just assumed I'm stupid and don't understand stuff you told me years ago. He's not mean he's just… I don't know._

A giant splot of ink followed on the page followed by a scrawl.

_Why can’t we write with normal pens, these quills are so annoying Severus! Constantly dipping and writing, ink everywhere!_

-

  
_Lily,_

_I’m fine. Calm down! They didn’t touch me. And even if they did, they're a bunch of rich little daddies boys who've never worked a day in their lives, what are they going to do anyway? Throw money at me?_

_That spell you mentioned is in the standard book of spells, I think it’s chapter five but don’t quote me. And why are you scared of flying? You literally don’t need a broom! You'll be fine._

_Is it still professor Slughorn? If it is mum says to say hello from Eileen Prince. I don't know what she thinks it'll do but try it, if he's still Head of Slytherin mum says he's a bit of a sod and thinks muggleborns are some sort of exotic creature if you can hold a wand and walk at the same time. Ignore him._

-

Severus dropped his school bag absently, opened the letter from Lily and promptly burst out laughing.

_Severus,_

_Your mum could have warned me! I said that and then Sirius Black started being mean to me for being friends with Slytherins, and then James Potter wanted to know how his cousin was and then some Slytherin sixth year prefect, (James said his name is Malfoy?) came up to me and told me that your mum’s name from my mouth was the final straw or something. I thought he was going to hex me! He called her a blood traitor and you a squib and called me something horrible about my blood and Sirius Black tried to punch him. What did you get me into?! Sirius says Malfoy is his cousin and he's a Death Eater. Do you know what that means? They only told me the basics and I'm scared, Severus, what if he comes after me._

“Mum, listen, listen, we’re officially blood traitors and I must be a squib.” Eileen looked up from where she had been plating up dinner, smiled absently and said.

“That’s nice dear, could you grab my wand and make a start on the washing up?”

“Sure, I told you Lily would be fine, she's already annoying death eaters.” Mum froze. “What?”

“You shouldn’t joke about that, they’re dangerous people.”

“She said it, oh and James Potter says hello. I'm guessing he's your cousin?”

“Yours actually, your uncle Marcus married Emily Potter, Emily is James’ aunt on his father’s side.”

“Are they the ones who like us or the ones who told you to throw me in the river when I was born?”

“The Potters are a light family, Severus, they never liked us Prince’s, we experiment too much, they just don’t hate you or your dad for existing.”

Severus considered for a moment as he flicked his mum’s wand and the dish sponge picked itself up and started scrubbing a pan.

“Fair enough, speaking of, mum, now schools settled down I want to get a Saturday job, can I?”

“I don’t see why not? Ask your dad, dear, see if there’s anything at the mill for you to make some pocket money, why is there something you want?”

“Well, I was thinking about saving up for my own wand, and then maybe dad could take me to the bank so I can open an account to save for when I leave school?”

“Well that's definitely a good idea, I can write to the ministry and get you a trace exemption so you can practice magic. You could even take your Owls if you wanted.”

Even though mum seemed excited she still looked a bit sad

“Mum? What's wrong?”

“Nothing, Severus, go call your dad to sit down and let’s eat.”

Not wanting to cause a row Severus dropped it, but he couldn’t help it, he was still wondering what mum’s problem was a week later.


	4. The Cost Of Education

“He’s eleven years old Toby he shouldn’t be worrying about saving money and the cost of things-” Severus froze in the doorway, why was mum yelling at dad?

“Well why not! When I was his age I was already at work.”

“That’s you, he’s still in school!”

“And schools an expensive privilege, I ain’t gon apologise for raising a kid who knows the value of what he’s been given.”

“You! Until two months ago, the only thing you were teaching him was not to scream under your belt and how to lie about how much you drank!”

Severus’s breath caught in his throat and he slammed the door open loudly, not caring if dad yelled at him. It was better than listening to them screaming at each other.

“Severus!”

“How much did you hear, lad?”

“Enough.” He muttered. “Honestly, mum leave him alone, he's trying.”

“Severus!”

“Lads got more sense than you ave, daft cow!”

“Can you stop for five minutes!” They both stared at him.

“I'm sick of it, dad's trying, he's sober, he's working, he hasn't laid hands on either of us fer months, mum's trying, magic is OK and the house is clean. So for once can you stop arguing about me? I know, I'm a burden, I get it-” he couldn't seem to stop himself ranting, this had been building up for years, he'd thought things were improving but mum was still on at him about learning magic and on at dad about the past, money was still tight and dad was smoking like a chimney.. "I always have been, I scared you dad and I'm a disappointment to mum. I know. But can you just stop taking it out on each other. I promise, as soon as I leave school And it's legal I'll go, in the meantime I'll try not to get in the way. Now can we live with that!?"

“You’ll be going nowhere son,” Tobias snapped, “except to university to be making a life for yersen and ome in summers where you can work and save your money.”

Severus never expected a declaration like that from dad. That kind of support. It boggled his mind.

“Until he decides to learn magic!” Eileen scoffed.

“He’s my son and I'll be damned if he throws his life away on magic tricks, if he wants to do it on side then fine, but he's got a good chance at this school and he's doing well, so leave well enough alone, woman!”

Mum opened her mouth.

"Mum!" Severus yelled. "Dads right, I don't want to be a wizard, can you imagine what would have happened if I'd have gone to Hogwarts? The Slytherin prefect is a Death Eater, how was that ever ending well for me?"

“You'd have fit in.” She insisted. “You're a wizard.”

Severus snorted, annoyed. Lily had been there less than a month and had a Malfoy as an enemy. The Malfoy's were in mum's genealogy book.

"Until when? Until the Slytherins realised what I am? Or until they tried to make me join them?"

“Whasat supposed to mean, what you are?” Dad asked and Severus scowled.

“Oh, just another fitzmud, dad, that’s what they’d call me.” Severus wasn't going to tell dad what the equivalent was, he'd had enough fights about that in his life already to rile dad up for no good reason. 

“Severus! Where did you hear that?” Mum sounded horrified

"Be careful what you let me read mum, some of your old textbooks really don’t like half-bloods."

“What? I never noticed anything like that-”

“Well you wouldn’t, they weren’t about you.”

“Severus,” Mum said, tone low and sad, “You shouldn’t say those things you don’t know what they mean.”

"Don't I?" Severus challenged, drawing up to his full height. "Made from dirt, muggle bastard, golem, unthinking, doesn't deserve a wand!"

“Severus!”

“Oi, I married yer mother proper and I won’t have you sayin otherwise.”

“I don’t have to, her sort don’t think muggles and magical can mix, as far as they’re concerned you’re basically an animal, dad.” The pain of his words twisted dad's expression, muggles were the same way even if for different reasons. 

“Stop it Severus, you know that’s not true.” Eileen fixed Tobias with a wary glance and Severus glared at her, he was sick of pretending that the magical world was all sunshine and roses and hiding it from dad when it was obvious dad no longer cared one way or the other.

“Your family disowned you because of me, did you think I don't know? Did you really think I didn't realise what they think of me.”

“Severus it’s more complicated than that-”

“No it's not! Why won't you tell him the truth, that even you look down on him, you treat a man like an animal and he'll act like one mum and I'm sick of it. Yeah so he belted me a few times and knocked you about, so what? At least he never pretended I wasn't his.” Not that he could when you saw them side by side despite Severus being as white as the day was long to look at. 

“Are you saying I did?” Mum looked close to tears.

“I'm saying that you didn't even see why I don't like that woman. You just assumed I was being rude and you didn't stop to wonder why!”

“Professor McGonogall is-”

“A bigot and a snob. And she's supposedly one of the good ones, she's the head of Gryffindor, no prizes for guessing that one. All you ever seem to do is apologise to magical folk that I exist and then try to tell me I'd fit right in.”

“I do not apologise because you exist.”

“No, you just try and make me do it. That's why I didn't want to go to Hogwarts mum, I didn't want to spend my life ashamed of where I came from and hiding from my own family!”

“You wouldn’t have?”

“No, so why have we never had so much as a Christmas card from any of them?”

-

Severus threw himself into his school work, he was going to prove to mum and everyone else that he didn’t need magic to make a life for himself and before he knew it months had passed. Lily had stopped writing in the end, he’d known she would get bored of him now they had literally nothing in common. It was springtime before he had enough money saved to go buy a wand and he wasn't all that interested in making time to do it even though mum was on at him. He knew she wanted him to love magic like she did but he couldn't make himself see it as anything but a third rate tool for the lazy or incompetent. There was nothing he wanted to do with magic that he couldn't do without it and he was better off for it. Eventually mum agreed to wait until summer so he could get his end of year exams out of the way.

**June 1972**

Maybe the extra year before he saw all the magic stuff meant he wasn't totally taken in by it but the entire setup just seemed Shakespearean and dated. Mum seemed to think it was quaint and wonderful that nothing had changed since she had bought her first wand. Severus just thought the old man who sold them had a monopoly and a good sales pitch but didn't comment. He ended up with a pine wand with a core of dragon heart-string. Dad wasn't convinced they were real and it wasn't all some huge con. Didn't stop him stopping to look at the Crups in the menagerie though. He'd always been a dog bloke.

“Anything else you need while we ‘ere lad?”

“Cauldron wouldn't go amiss dad, mum's old one has a layer of rust in it that keeps turning my more delicate stuff to sludge. I've got money for it.” Severus said and pointed across the road to the apothecary. Tobias skinned up his nose but nodded.

“Go on then, lead the way.”

Severus stepped into the dingy shop and immediately pulled his t-shirt up over his nose. The smell was worse than the chicken factory on a Friday night and that stench spread halfway across town because the bloke who owned it didn’t clean the drains properly after a week's work. He heard dad gag and physically recoil at the door.

"I'll wait out ere for ye." He called out, voice coming out all nasally where he was clearly holding his nose. Severus waved his hand and put a thumb up, making a beeline for the pre-packed first year potions kits and potions that came with them. He'd written to the man, and half the other shops as well, to ask how much before they had arranged to come and this one had written back with exactly what he needed and how much. He'd seemed nice in the letter and had told Severus in a postscript to ask for Mister Jigger and he could have a discount and a copy of Magical Drafts and Potions signed for free because "it not every day a homeschooled student your age writes to me and already knows so much about the craft." The comment had made Severus blush slightly, he'd waxed a bit lyrical about the state of his mum's cauldron and what he wanted to do with the blood replenishing potion to make it stronger.

The only other place to send back such a personal reply had been the bookshop who had basically told him that the books he had hadn't changed between being published and now and he only really needed updated versions of Hogwarts: a History and Nature's Nobility: A Wizarding Genealogy, though they had recommended that he look at some of the more advanced stuff if he already understood the theory of what was in the books he had said he already had. He'd go there after this so dad could have a cuppa in their little cafe upstairs as sorting out which books to get would take a while.

He approached the counter carefully letting his shirt drop back down and keeping his breathing shallow so he wasn’t sick until he could stomach it.

“Excuse me?” The girl behind the counter looked about eighteen.

“Oh hello, off to Hogwarts next year?” She asked cheerfully and Severus shook his head.

“I’m homeschooled,” he answered and her expression darkened, “I wrote to mister Jigger and he told me to ask for him when I came in?” He said hopefully and waved the letter at her absently.

“Mister Jigger doesn’t take visitors during business hours.” She said primly and Severus sighed.

“But he said, please, is he here?” She seemed to soften a but and Severus pressed the advantage.

“What’s your name?”

“Severus Snape, he did say to ask for him, honest.”

“Give me a minute I'll poke my heard round his door and see if he'll come out.” She tapped her wand on the desk and eyes an old witch in the corner as she lowered her voice. “Watch out for her for me? Stock always seems to go down even when she doesn't buy anything.”

Severus let his eyes go wide and nodded. That wasn’t a nice thing to say but he wasn't going to argue if it got mister Jigger out here. Severus was looking at a display of various spleens when the door opened as a portly looking fellow with foppish looking hair stepped out. He did not look like a world class potions master, he looked like the music teacher at school; thick in the neck and with a permanently befuddled look about him like he'd had too many cymbals bashed next to his ears in the course of his life. They had clearly scared off the last of his hair at the same time too.

"Ah, young mister Snape?" _Did all wizards have plummy accents or was it just the ones he had the odd luck of meeting?_ He talked like the drama teacher who spent nearly all of the class demanding they practice elocution and calling them Thespians. Ugh. Severus has learned very quickly that he hated drama and had no interest in making a tit of himself on stage.

“Yes-sir. You said to ask after you when I came in?”

“Ah yes, I remember, I promised you a book if I recall?”

“You… don’t have to sir, I’m more interested in hearing what you thought of my work with the blood replenishing potion.”

The man laughed aloud, a deep fruity laugh that made Severus glad dad was outside so he didn’t start muttering about ponces and weirdos, or just say it outright.

“An interesting proposition you made, what made you think of it?”

“Something my biology teacher said about blood and protein. And eggs have a lot of protein.”

“You would have to take care not to scramble it but I see no reason why not.” He flicked his wand and a second first year kit flew towards him, sans cauldron. “Take this so you have extra ingredients and write to me with your findings.”

“Seriously? But… I can't…”

“No charge, but do write to me won’t you?”

Severus nodded.

“Of, of course sir.” He blinked and rummaged in his pocket for his coin bag and the girl behind the counter started putting his stuff into a tote bag and then put all of it in his new cauldron. Mister Jigger added a book to the bag and waved him out the door to meet dad, who looked at him funny but didn’t say anything.

-

"Severus you can't get that it's a NEWT level text!" Eileen told him and Severus glanced down at the book then back at his mum.

"The man behind the counter said I've read enough to get it," he told her as Tobias took a gulp of tea.

"Don't be silly, Severus, put it back it's far too advanced." 

"What's a NEWT?" Tobias asked and Eileen pulled a face 

"Like A levels, Da." Severus said, "but you know, for stuff like this."

"So get it, worst case you get to it later. Save us a trip when you do need it." Tobias said with a shrug. He seemed to have accepted that Severus was going to study magic alongside school and didn't seem to mind too much anymore so long as the explosions were kept to the basement Severus had claimed with a camping stove to practice over.


	5. Forward Planning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Big time skip in this one

June 1976

“You know Hogwarts finishes when we’re seventeen, I was going to try to go to college and get a couple of O levels,” Lily said quietly from her swing and Severus looked up at her, confused.

“Why? Aren’t you engaged to my cousin? John Potter or whatever his name is?” She’d come home completely doe eyed about the boy at school and how he’d fancied her for ages and wouldn’t stop asking her out. It made Severus want to vomit. Going to an all-boys school had made him something of an idiot about girls, but even he knew that he wouldn’t just nag a girl for a date; not least because Dad would kill him for putting pressure on a girl like that.

“His name is James and you _know_ it.” Lily retorted playfully, smile playing around her lips, she’d gotten used to his deliberate disinterest in anything to do with Hogwarts years ago. “And what’s that got to do with anything?”

“Lily, you don’t have to work a day in your life, he’s rich, he probably expects to keep you for a mother and housewife.” She had to know that no upper class bloke was going to let his wife work in case someone assumed he couldn’t afford to keep her.

She pulled a face and Severus smirked, six years at Hogwarts and she still didn’t really understand the culture. He was glad he’d dodged that bullet especially with some of the wilder stories she’d brought home this summer. How she hadn’t looked at her parents and seen that one coming though, he had no idea.

“What did your parents say, anyway?”

“Not much, mum’s disappointed I’m not going to be a career woman but I think dad’s pleased,”

“You think your dad is pleased that you want to marry that lout?”

“You’ve met him once.”

“And once is more than enough, _thank you_.” He shot back and Lily let out a nervous giggle. James really hadn’t taken to Severus and Severus had been close to punching him when he had insulted Petunia at the dinner table. Petunia had realised he liked her cooking and had been inviting him round for years, and Doctor Evans’ stories of his medical practice were all the excuse Severus needed to jump at that chance. Severus was the school boxing champion, so it wasn’t like he hadn't been more than capable of knocking Potter's teeth down his throat when he started calling every Slytherin past and present a death eater. Severus was very protective of his mother's reputation and the house he would have joined, thank you. He might have let that go, but you didn’t sit in a muggle house, when they were being good enough to feed you and entertain you, and gush about how quaint and cute it was that they couldn’t do this or that without magic.

“Did you decide what you want to do after school yet?”

Severus shrugged.

“Mum thinks I should do something magical now I've started getting my NEWTs, dad wants me to do anything _but_ magic and I don't really blame him. Magical science is _really bad,_ Lils.”

“So you keep saying,” she said, eyes rolling automatically.

“I want to go to uni, I’m pretty sure I can do it if I keep a part time job and stay local as well.”

“What would you study?”

“Law, _maybe_? Medicine. I’m not really sure to be honest, and uncle Steve said I've got first shout on apprenticing at the garage then I could study business at the college if I want it.”

“Aren’t you already better than most of his apprentices?”

“I’ve been hanging around there since I was eleven, so I hope so. It would be good pay, I could go solo after a few years and start my own place up. He hates working on motorbikes and you know I love them.”

“Yes, I do, you madman. Honestly,”

“Your _boyfriend_ wants to be a professional seeker and I’m the nutter?”

“You’re both mad.” She answered and Severus laughed to himself.

“Would you really be a doctor?” Severus looked up at her thoughtfully. Trust Lily to know he'd never really seriously considered Law- he didn't have the accent, for one thing.

“I’d like to, you probably don’t see it much but if it wasn’t for your dad coming down our end sometimes… and he’s getting old.” Severus shrugged. He could set up a private practice here, take over when doctor Evans retired and he was getting close to it. It would be a well respected position for life with a good income. The idea had been in the back of his mind for years but he’d never dared approach Doctor Evans or anyone else for advice about it.

“Doesn’t your school give careers advice?”

“Yeah but… they overestimate me.” Severus answered warily.

“What do you mean?”

“My science prof got a bee in his bonnet and told me to apply to Cambridge or Oxford like I’m not dirt poor and never applied myself to elocution lessons.” He ignored the odd look she fixed him with, he was probably the only boy in his home street who knew what elocution even was.

“Oxford or Cambridge, really? _Wow_! He must think you're really clever to do that.” She said, tone slightly awed. “Why don't you?”

“Lily, they’d eat me alive…”

She snickered

“I’d like to see them try.” She retorted and Severus laughed.

“Don’t tell my parents, will you? I’ll never hear the end of it if Da thinks someone who knows wants me to go to Cambridge or Oxford and I didn't go for it.”

“Maybe I will tell him, you should at least try-”

“Lily, I don't want to! Can you imagine? At least here the lads at school are all local, can you imagine me mixing with posh southern gits for too long?”

“You’d eat them alive,” she muttered, “I still think it’s a good idea…”

Severus sighed. Great. That meant he had about a day to tell his dad before Lily _accidentally on purpos_ e let it slip when she happened to drop round to clue mum in on the latest goings on at Hogwarts.

“Anyway, enough about me, you said something about death eaters at Hogwarts?”

“Oh yes, three Slytherin boys and a Ravenclaw were expelled in May right before the exams. It was _horrible_.”

“Why did they do?”

“They attacked Mary, she’s lucky to be alive!” Lilly said seriously and Severus blinked, eyebrows raising with surprise.

“Why would they do that, seems a bit stupid?”

“You should hear the stuff they were saying, it’s scary, Sev, they carved a word into her chest and… she won’t talk about what else they did.”

“A word… ugh, that’s sick.” Severus muttered.

“You don’t even know what word it was.”

“Lily, they carved a word into her chest, it doesn’t matter what word it was. That’s what crazy religious nuts used to do to people they thought were witches.” She nodded along as if she knew what she was talking about. “But I'll humour you, what was the word?”

“They er… James had to explain to me why it was so bad, he wanted to go kill them, Sirius too. Even Remus got really angry. They, they carved the word _mudblood_ on her. I'd forgotten Malfoy calling me that, no one told me what a big deal it was at the time so....” She shrugged absently

The chain of the swing he was sat on started to vibrate and a hot wind swept between them.

“Tell me you’re joking?” Severus demanded, voice tight. “What the _fuck_?” Lily eyed the chain nervously.

“Severus…?” She said softly. “You know, we're nearly seventeen your magic really shouldn't do that when you get mad.”

“My magic does that when I get murderous, who does something like that?”

“Death eaters,” she said, voice small, “that's why they were expelled. There's a rumour that Lucius Malfoy got arrested then released without charge after they were interviewed. It's life in Azkaban if they're found guilty.”

“Bloody good, stay away from them Lily, they sound like lunatics.”

“I'm not an idiot, Sev, I know what they'd do to me if they caught me but you need to be careful too. Your OWL results got posted in the paper with ours so they know you exist as well.”

“Let them dare come for me,” he declared, “I’m doing things with magic that even the professors at Hogwarts don’t get and I’m doing it as a hobby,” he told her, “you know Mister Jigger gave me credit for his improvement on the blood replenishing potion?”

She nodded. “I nearly fell off my stool when I saw your name in the book, when did you do that?”

“I did that when I was eleven Lily, wrote to him and he wrote back. He's offered me an apprenticeship too. But if I can do that with magic, I could be a medical researcher and really make a difference.” Lily fixed him with a knowing look, maybe he was being too obvious about wanting to study medicine and science.

“No wonder you don’t want to say anything to anyone, how many offers and suggestions have you had?”

“Too many, even the postman had an opinion after Dad bragged at him every morning for a week about his son doing A levels.” Severus’s sigh at Dad bragging made Lily smile. They both knew there were definitely worse problems to have.

“What, how did they even-?”

“I sent off to Bradford Business School for a booklet and it came in.”

“They’ve got a good reputation, haven’t they?”

“ _Very_ , even though my form tutor skinned up his nose at the idea.”

“Why?”

“It's Bradford. He's the one who told me to go to Cambridge. He thinks it's below someone who attended his precious grammar school.” _Like Cokeworth was much different._

“Well, I mean, it would be a bit of a waste, Sev.”

Severus paused, coming from Lily that comment resounded when he’d dismissed his tutor’s attitude as typical upper class snobbery.

“Why? What's wrong with going to learn business?”

“Nothing.” He relaxed but she wasn't finished. “When you just left the secondary modern and don't have actual options like university and a proper rich man's career.”

“I don't want to be rich, Lils, rich people are pricks. I know, I go to school with them.” He put up with them and fit in as the token working class bloke who didn’t take any rubbish about his accent but he wasn’t one of them, not really.

“You don’t have to be, and like you said, you could do so much good if you got a degree and did something in science or medicine.”

Severus stood up abruptly.

“Lil… what I can do and what I want to do, they’re two different things.”

“Well, what’s stopping you?”

He fixed her with a pitying look.

“The usual things. Money. Distance. The fact that I wasn't born with a _silver spoon_ in my mouth.”

“Sev,” she said, standing up slowly, “what would you do, if money and distance weren’t a problem?”

“They are, there’s no use wishing otherwise.” Severus said firmly.

“I’m not asking you to wish, just to imagine for a minute.”

He couldn’t help the tiny bubble of hope that filled his chest.

“Stop it.” He told her, tone hard when he caught himself.

“Tell me? I won't tell anyone, I promise.”

“I…” he wanted to, so badly, to tell her about how he wanted to be a doctor, to take over when her dad retired, to really help people. He wanted to do for the kids who played on the street now what her dad had done for him. He'd got dad sober, deloused Severus at least twice when he'd been younger, he'd saved Steve when he'd got mumps and Peter when he got that weird bout of Polio. Her expression caught him off guard and before he knew it he had spilled his guts. She was staring at him openly. “I told you it could never happen.” He finished bitterly. There was no use in hoping. There was no way he could afford to go to uni for seven years.

Lily blinked rapidly as her mouth worked to form words.

“You’re coming home with me, right now!” She said, tone demanding and Severus stared at her.

“Why?”

“Because daddy’s home and you’re going to sit down and tell him what you just told me and ask him if you can do it.” She had hold of his arm and was already trying to pull him in the right direction.

“No, Lily, stop it. I can't.”

“Yes you can, come on!” He had a split second decision to make. He could yank his arm free or let himself be pulled along. He didn’t have the heart to break her grip and so before long he found himself outside her house.

“Come on Lily you can’t be serious, he’ll just laugh at me.”

“No he won't, he likes you.” Lily said and Severus sighed. “Besides, we're here now, come on.”

“He’s probably too busy to talk to me,” that excuse was weak, Doctor Evans had always had time for him and Lily’s snort said she knew it too.

Petunia was in the living room. Severus made himself look anywhere but at her. He had grown to respect her over the years and it was bad enough Lily was about to tell her dad that Severus was an idiot with his head in the clouds, he didn’t need Petunia hearing it and spreading it around town as well.

“Severus.” Her greeting seemed slightly warmer than usual. “Have you talked her out of marrying that idiot and marrying you yet?”

Severus stared and even Lily froze.

“What?” Lily said, voice thin.

“No I haven't. Who she marries is her business.” Severus snapped. The jokes about him and Lily had gotten old before they were thirteen. The idea of marrying her, it made him feel slightly sick. She was more like his sister than anything else, and besides, she wasn't the Evans girl who could cook, clean and had really grown into her looks.

“Calm down I was only teasing,” Petunia declared and Severus glared back. _Why was she smiling?_

“Well don't.” He sniped back as Lily disappeared to go find her dad.

“It's not like it's an insult, she could do a lot worse than marrying you. That James of hers is horrible and he has no manners at all.”

Severus didn’t have an answer for that and he had to quash the hopeful bubble in his chest. Had Petunia finally lost her marbles completely, or _what_? He’d ruined any chance with Petunia years ago, plus she was already engaged as well.

“Like that bloke you’re seeing is any better, isn’t he twenty nine or something?” That Dursley character was not good enough for her, but Severus wasn’t sure any man was good enough for either of the Evans girls.

“So?”

“You're nineteen and he's your boss, Petunia, it's creepy.” Severus said bluntly. “I'm surprised your dad is letting it happen.” He added and petunia pulled a face, they both knew that Doctor Evans didn't particularly like Vernon much.

“It’s not like anyone else will have me.” She said primly and Severus frowned.

“Why not? You're not bad looking, you can cook and you've got your typing certificate.” He suddenly felt very uncomfortable when she blushed and giggled as if he'd paid her a massive compliment. He really hoped she didn't think he was flirting, he was not about to lose his friendship with this family over a failed relationship with their eldest daughter.

“You like my cooking?” She’d cooked one day when Lily had dragged him home. She was a better cook than his mum even with magic, not that he was going to tell her that, just in case she giggled again. He wasn't sure his nerves could take it.

“It’s… not bad.” He hedged carefully. It didn’t seem to make the grin smaller on her face and she was making him feel jumpy and self-conscious.

“Severus, what can I do for you son?” Severus jumped to his feet.

“Doctor Evans, I…”

“My daughter tells me you had a question for me?” He asked, tone kindly.

Severus fixed Lily with a glare and she just looked back, expression obstinate.

“Why don’t we step into my office and talk about it?” Doctor Evans asked and Severus nodded, anything to escape the awkwardness of that room.

“Yes sir.”

He followed the older man and closed the door carefully behind him. Doctor Evan’s study was a wonderful room, he had an old fashioned globe and an entire shelf full of medical books. He saw patients in here sometimes. That was the sofa dad had sat in when he had come to doctor Evans for help staying sober when Severus had been twelve, it was the sofa Severus himself had sat in when he'd finally swallowed his pride and tried to find out why his hair wouldn't stay clean for more than a few hours, mum had laid there and doctor Evans had given her a pill let her sleep when she had gone to him crying that she couldn't sleep at night last year after she had heard Lily talking about death eaters and anti-muggle violence.

“Sit down, Severus.”

Doctor Evans waited expectantly as Severus slipped into the hard backed chair facing doctor Evans desk.

“Lily says you want to be a doctor?”

Severus bit back the urge to swear. Of course Lily had told him so Severus couldn’t wriggle out of admitting it.

“I… think so sir.” Severus said slowly. “But… well…” he couldn't help blushing slightly. “I'm not sure if… well, if I'm good enough.”

“Well, how are your grades in maths and science?”

“Straight As, Sir. I like maths and science.”

“Well that's a good start. Better than I had at your age.”

Severus relaxed minutely.

“Why do you want to be a doctor, Severus, you know it’s not an easy life?”

“I know it's not. But… well, I want to help… I,” his blush deepened and he had to stop himself from stammering, "you do so much around our end and...I thought maybe, no other doctor comes our way and there's a lot of kids in the area."

“And you have rightly guessed that I will probably retire within a decade or so?”

Severus couldn’t make himself answer. It felt disrespectful.

“Well, you aren’t wrong, and it would be a relief to see someone who cared about the area take over rather than some stranger the hospital installed.”

“Do… do you think I could do it, sir?”

“I think if you really wanted to you could, Severus, you're a clever young man and it's something you clearly want to do even if you won't outright admit it. Have you looked at medical schools?”

“Um… _myteacherthinks_ I should er, he said I should go to Oxford or Cambridge.” Severus said so quietly he mumbled it. “But… I don't really want to go that far.”

“You don't have to. Manchester has an excellent medical programme. As does Leeds.”

Severus blinked. He hadn’t thought of Leeds. It had seemed a bit posh for him, but he supposed if he was good enough to apply for Cambridge then _why not Leeds_? It was just down the road.

“Of course, a medical degree from Cambridge or Oxford could open many doors for you.”

“But…” Severus wasn’t sure how to explain not wanting to go that far or the difficulties about money even with years of savings and Dad saying he’d help.

“Severus, you are a wizard like Lily, aren’t you?” Doctor Evans asked and Severus swallowed and nodded. The man had known that for years.

“She mentioned something called appearing or something. Can you do that?”

“Apparating, sir, yes?”

“So… does it really matter where you go to school if you can do that?”

Severus blinked. He hadn’t really considered that magic might solve such a big problem. It never had before.

“Well, not really… I could theoretically apparate anywhere to anywhere every day.”

“So make the applications then. Oxford, Cambridge, Leeds, Manchester and anywhere else you like." He said it like it was already decided, it made Severus straighten up a little that Doctor Evans seemed to have that kind of confidence in him. "What have you got to lose?” Doctor Evans asked kindly and Severus blinked.

“N-nothing. I…. I really could do it.” He said quietly and Doctor Evans smiled at the awed tone Severus said those words in.


	6. Progress

** 9 June 1977 **

Severus had applied himself to his lessons with new vigour for the last months of the school year, every waking hour not spent studying was spent perfecting application, reaching out for references and writing essays and statements. For once mum and dad both thought he’d lost it when he told them what he was doing- though their reasons were different. Mum didn't understand why he wanted to be a doctor when he could be a healer and dad thought he was dreaming to think he might get so much as a 'thanks but no thanks' from any of the universities he was looking at, he was less vocal about it but Severus saw the nerves in the man's eyes the day Severus had asked if he needed anything while his son took a walk down to the post office to send the applications. 

“Dad,” he said quietly when he realised dad was staring at the envelopes, “even if I don't get them, I've still got options. Push comes to shove, I'll take uncle Steve's offer and fix people's cars instead of fixing their bodies.”

It was the right thing to say because dad cracked a smile and nodded, finally meeting his eyes. Anything that hinted that he wasn’t going to run off and become a full time wizard was still the right thing to say to dad.

“Actually then, as you’re going that way, stop off and grab me cigs?” He said as he reached for his wallet from his back pocket. 

“Sure, I’ve got them money for it, don’t worry about it.”

“Severus?” Dad asked, apparently confused.

“Let me buy your cigs for once dad, it’ll hardly break the bank.” Severus said pointedly and dad eyed him as if considering him for a moment.

“You’re sure?” 

“Yeah, call it a little thank you.”

“For what?”

“For letting me at least try.” 

Somehow dad seemed to understand Severus didn’t just mean this time.

“Alright. Don't make a habit though, your money is yours and your driving test is coming up so you gon need it.”

“Deal.” 

The walk down to the post office was quiet and Severus was lost in his own thoughts and nerves about his applications until someone called his name.

“Severus!” He looked up from the counter 

“Petunia... Evans?” He asked, blinked and frowned, confused that she was here and had bothered to call to him.

“Hi, how are you?” She seemed determined to smile at him and her eyes were bright as if she was exited to see him. Girls were odd.

“Er… not too bad, you?” He tried to to look at her too much, not quite sure how much eye contact was normal or polite.

“Well, thank you. Just picking up some stamps and cigarettes for daddy, the shop up the road has run out of his brand.” She said waving a packet.

Severus blinked, there were three shops between the Evans’s and here. He didn’t comment. It was weird seeing one of the posh girls this far down.

Severus nodded and took his own father’s cigs, his own and the receipt for his letters. He’d sent them recorded to make sure they got there. The man behind the counter fixed him with a questioning side glance at Petunia and Severus answered with a tiny tilt of his head and shrug.

“Thanks Jay,” he said absently as he stepped away from the counter. “You really shouldn't come down here on your own, you know.” He told Petunia quietly. 

“ _Honestly_ , Severus I’m not made of glass,”

“Even still, it’s not the safest area, let me walk you back at least?” He offered and she fixed him with an odd look before nodding. Did she not expect him to make sure she got back safe knowing what this area could be like? Maybe she didn't know that even the dogs roamed around here in pairs.

“If you insist?”

“Yeah, I do. Your old man and mine would go nuts if I didn't.” Clearly she didn't know as much as she thought she did.

He wasn’t wrong. Doctor Evans looked stunned when Petunia appeared at the door and it was only when he saw Severus, who he knew from years of Lily bringing him around in the summers, that he stopped looking so worriedly at his watch and the road they had come down.

“She came all the way down to Spinner’s End for your cigarettes, sir, and no offence, but it’s not exactly the place for a nice girl to be on her own.” 

Doctor Evans nodded and agreed emphatically with him, shooting Petunia a look that spoke volumes about how worried he had been while she scowled and flushed slightly, Severus wouldn't have been surprised if she did actually know better than to go that far and had been pushing her luck.

“I completely agree, Severus, why don't you come in for a drink? Lily is home.”

“Thanks for the offer, doctor, but I need to get back before dad chews his own arm off without his cigs.” Severus answered with a smile and doctor Evans waved him off with thanks again for seeing Petunia home safe.

**11 June 1977**

Severus wasn’t paying attention to the post arriving until dad dropped an envelope onto his lap. He glanced at it and froze. His exam results and scholarship documentation for next year. There was no other reason for an envelope with school’s logo on it to be in his lap.

"Well, goan open it." Dad said absently as he read a random bill or whatever and set it on the table. Severus swallowed and picked it up. He always got nervous about them, his scholarship depended on his exam results. He already knew what he needed to keep it. He'd never been so relieved to see the usual string of A's and B's down the page next to subjects. How he'd managed to get it for history after he'd disagreed with the teacher about the causes of the first world war he didn't know, maybe that's why he had.

“How are they?” Dad asked and Severus nodded.

“Yeah, usual. I'm never going to be better than a B in Sports.”

“You’re the school’s top boxer?”

“I'm also skinny and can't catch a ball when it's thrown at my head. Don't worry about it, I don't.” Severus answered and dad nodded.

“And yer maths?”

“When has my maths ever not been an A, dad?” He asked and dad chuckled. 

“Good, your-” Severus murmured along automatically with an eye-roll, “maths is everything,” dad coughed and swatted at him with an envelope half playfully. “Cheeky lickle sod.”

It was Severus’s turn to laugh back.

** Jan 10 1978 **

Severus had never been so nervous in his life. He’d been taking lessons for months and been driving since he was tall enough to get behind the wheel- uncle Steve had made sure of it. So why was he so terrified about passing something simple like his driving test? 

“How are you?”

“Nervous,” Severus admitted shortly as he fastened his seatbelt and adjusted the instructor’s seat and mirror to his preference absently. 

“Well you’ve got two hours to drive it off, we’ll get there for your test, you’ll do that and I’ll bring you home afterwards either way.” 

Severus swallowed and nodded.

“OK, out of here and turn right,” driving came naturally to him but it didn’t mean he wasn’t worried he’d do something completely stupid and fail. It took half an hour and a perfectly executed three point turn before he started to relax and right on cue Pete directed him to start driving to the test centre, why they had to take the motorway when it wasn’t even on the test wasn't for him to question. The first half of the test went by in a blur, yes he could see the number plate, no he didn't have any medical conditions, he was nearly on the dual carriageway when he finally realised that he seemed to be doing fine and let himself relax. The questions at the end had him tongue tied for a minute and he got a pair of road signs mixed up, but the instructor was decent about it, he'd obeyed them when he was driving so he obviously knew what they were. 

“Alright. You've passed.” 

“W-what?”

“You've passed your driving test, son, good job. No faults.”

“W-wow, thank you.” 

The man laughed.

“You're welcome. Hop out let me go get your instructor and your certificate and then we're done.” 

It took Severus two attempts to unfasten his seatbelt. 

“Sorry, adrenaline.”

“And that’s we don’t let you drive home.” 

Severus managed a laugh as he climbed out of the car and took a breath. He’d passed. He'd done it. Even if he failed apparition tomorrow it wouldn't be that big a deal. He could drive.

Dad was waiting in the garden as they pulled up, Severus turned to his instructor and smiled. Pete had been a good bloke and taught him well so he could pass first time.

"Thank you so much for everything, I really appreciate it." Severus stuck out his hand and Pete shook it briefly. He pulled out a flip-book of some sort and tore out a page after writing something on it.

“You’ll need this too, advanced driver certificate,” 

“Wait, what? I was going to ring you next week about that.”

“What did you think the two hours earlier was for? You asked me right when you started and that's what I've been teaching you to. Make sure you submit it, it'll take a chunk out of your insurance.” 

“I… I will, thank you.”

“Not a problem, Severus, you deserve it. Now go on, your old man looks ready to have a heart attack if we keep him waiting much longer.” 

Severus climbed out of the car and dad went stock still as Severus came through the gate and up the path 

“Well?” He asked anxiously as he looked Severus up and down.

“Passed.” Severus said and dad let out a massive whoop that made him immediately wish they were inside.

“Daaad,” Severus groaned quietly as mum appeared at the door, he could feel the heat rising up his face. Dad said it before he could.

“He passed, Lee, our boy passed first time!” 

Mum let out a shriek next and Severus wanted the floor to swallow him whole. It was nice to have the support but bloody hell they were both loud.

“Eh, what’s gone on?” Severus took the opportunity to sneak inside as dad started yelling across the street at Mark. It was nice to escape into the warmth of the kitchen. Dad came in less than a minute later. 

“What you hiding in here for?” 

“Grabbing some cake from yesterday to celebrate,” Severus said as he pulled the box out of the fridge and a plate from the cupboard, “want some?” A moment later he had three plates laid out knowing mum would be back in any minute.

“Severus come outside, your uncle Steve is in his garden.” Steve wasn’t his real uncle but they had lived on this street so long him and dad were like brothers and he was Severus's godfather. There was something about Steve and Dad working together once but Severus didn't know the whole of that story. Severus set the plate down and threw a tea towel over it before heading outside.

“Grammar school, passed his driving test on first time, is there anything you can’t do, kid?” Uncle Steve asked and Severus went bright red all over again as the words reached him in the doorway.

“If there is, they ain’t found it yet.” 

“Dad!” Severus muttered quietly and dad laughed 

“Humble too, you got yourselves a good one there.” Steve said and dad grinned and clapped Severus so hard in the middle of his back he was nearly punted off the porch step.


	7. Proposal

When the kerfuffle had finally died down and half the street had been over with congratulations and well wishes Severus finally got the chance to lay back on the sofa and relax for a minute so he could absorb the events of the day. He wasn't expecting the door to go again and was expecting the person there even less. It was one thing for Lily to come this way to talk to mum- he’d gotten used to that over the years- but Petunia? Was she lost? He couldn't believe she was standing there of all places.

“Who's she?” Dad asked and Severus half turned his head.

"Dr Evans' daughter.” Dad looked confused, “The _other_ one." He added softly.

“Hello Severus, Mr Snape.” She said as if she were actually trying to be polite. It was a bit unnerving. Petunia didn’t really do polite, unless they were still trying to pretend they didn’t like each other, in which case she was painfully so."Daddy had an appointment who told him you'd passed your driving test today, Severus." She said and Severus blinked at her. So? That still didn’t explain why she was here.

"Er… yeah. Good news travels fast then." He couldn't look at her properly; She'd got pretty in the last year and he'd got old enough to really appreciate it, it was kind of embarrassing- not least because when he was at the Evans’s to see the doctor she was so carefully painfully nice he had started to wonder if she no longer knew how to take him either. The last time she’d come this far down town he’d walked her back for fear she’d be robbed in broad daylight.

"Something like that." She agreed with a small smile. "Well... mummy and I were baking and I thought I'd bring some shortbread around to say congratulations."

"Er… thanks," he took the box off her carefully and led her into the kitchen, fixing dad with an utterly confused look when she stepped in the direction he gestured. "Come into the kitchen out of the smoke?" Dad was smirking around his cig and Severus did _not_ want to know why.

"Your parents home is lovely," she said and Severus blinked, that wasn't the word he would have used, "I never realised the houses here were so big inside!" She actually wasn't joking. "It's not magic, is it?"

"No, it's not magic, they're all this size. Dad would go mad if we made the place bigger with magic, it would screw with his depth perception of the place." Severus answered absently and she nodded, looking around with barely concealed curiosity. She seemed to actually like it and not be judging it.

"Oh… well, it _is_ very nice." She said as if that settled the matter and put her hands across her front like she was stood getting ready to sing in a choir line-up. "So, when was your birthday? If you took your test today?"

"Yesterday, which means I'm of age to do magic if I want as well but I wanted to learn to drive properly." Severus said and ignored her playing with her hair, she probably felt as awkward as he did why she seemed to be twirling the end of her braid around her finger.

"Oh, I didn't know your birthday was yesterday!"

Severus shrugged. She had no reason to know, it wasn’t like there had been any sort of big celebration- mum and dad couldn’t afford that and Severus hadn’t been about to ask them to do more than they had. There weren’t many seventeen year olds who could afford their own car, insurance and still have money in the bank; they had done enough.

"Did you get anything nice?"

"New watch from mum and dad, it's traditional, you know? And dad paid for the driving test." He said as he picked out a piece of shortbread and lifted it to his mouth.

"Wow, how do you manage to cook and bake so well?" He asked after taking a bite. "Even with magic I bet mum would struggle to make it come out this well." He said it without thinking and Petunia went scarlet with pleasure. He made himself look anywhere but at her before he embarrassed himself even more.

"Mummy taught me to make these years ago, they're daddy's favourite."

Severus swallowed and smiled, trying to keep the conversation light and friendly (and not friendlier).

"I can see why he married her, they're well nice." He said with a grin and there was no denying it this time, Petunia was definitely flirting with him judging by the wide smile and doe eyes. It took him a second to realise he was flirting back even as he tried not to. _For god’s sake she was engaged, what was he doing?_

"So," he cast around quickly for a safe topic, "how's work going?"

"It's going really well, of course, Vernon got a promotion so he said we could probably set a date soon." Something in her tone seemed off. Or did he just hope it did? He’d never quite let himself admit that he really didn’t like Vernon, not to her anyway, that wouldn’t be fair. The man had spoken to Doctor Evans like he owned the man's home and Severus had taken all of his will not to say anything back. Dinners at the Evans’s were common now he was working towards medical school and Severus had seen enough of Vernon after being invited to stay for dinner to hope Mrs Evans cooked fish and the wanker choked on a bone one day.

"Petunia?" Severus probed gently as he set the biscuit down.

"Yes?"

"Is everything alright, with you and Vernon, I mean?" Severus tried to sound nonchalant but he wasn’t good at that; Doctor Evans had told him to start applying himself more to learning how to act so he didn’t freak his patients out. He’d gone and dug mums old books on Occlumency out instead; learning it would have the same outcome without ever having to wear tights and make a tit of himself now the teacher was determined to make them all _Shakespearean Thespians._

“Oh yes, why wouldn’t it be?”

He wasn’t imaging that, Petunia was lying through her teeth. It wasn’t just wishful thinking either, he could see it in her eyes, she looked a little trapped for a moment. He had a split second to make a decision and he chose to push it.

“You’ve been engaged over a year and… well, I’ve seen the way your dad looks at him.” Like he wants to kill him. Severus didn’t say that bit out loud. He didn't have to.

“Daddy is never going to like anyone I bring home, you know how he is. Vernon is a good man and he earns a good living.”

“That's your benchmark, _really_?” Severus asked, surprised. Petunia spent so long with her head in romance novels he’d assumed she wanted a bit more than a cold marriage to a man’s bank account.

"So, what if it is?"

"Do you love him?" Severus instantly regretted the words at the look Petunia fixed him with.

"We're not all as lucky as Lily to have an option like that." She snapped and Severus reared up in surprise. He hadn’t quite expected such a harsh response form her. "He's kind and he'll look after me." Severus couldn't help it. His heart was racing, he’d pointedly not made a move because he’d thought she _loved_ Dursely but... Did he have to wave and sing at her? He was right here. He might not be established yet but he could have been a good husband to her and he wouldn't care about any past engagement or what that probably implied they had done for it to go on so long. He stepped past her and closed the kitchen door.

"That's not a good reason to get married, Petunia, especially to a bloke his size who can't handle his drink." She looked ready to kill him for a second and then all the anger drained out of her. That was why he didn’t like the man, he showed up, Drank Doctor Evans’s best brandy then had to sleep it off before he left, and he had a mouth on him with a drink in him and said some things that really didn’t bear repeating when he forgot he was talking to his fiance’s father or thought the man couldn’t hear him.

"How-how did you know?" She asked, voice small. Severus was as surprised as she was that she'd admitted it so easily. He'd seen Vernon get sloppy and it has rung alarm bells but he'd pointedly said nothing. It wasn't his place until right now when Petunia looking like that, in his parents kitchen, had made it so.

"Has he hit you?" Severus demanded, tone hard. He’d wondered, Dursely gestured a lot when he was drunk and he wasn’t shy about getting loud. Dad might have sobered up but it didn't mean Severus had forgotten what those years had been like. He had a dad in a million to come back from that, he wasn't convinced Vernon was even half the man dad was. She hesitated a second too long and Severus had to grab the kitchen table to stop himself swinging for the wall.

"No wonder you dad wants to _fucking_ murder him, what are you thinking to still be engaged to him?" It was taking all of his effort not to shout or get in her face, she looked terrified for a second and it made him back off. He didn’t want her to be scared of him, her bloke on the other hand- he would get what was coming to him after the look on her face right now.

"He… he'll change once we're married. He's just stressed from trying to save for a wedding."

Severus couldn't help it, he snorted and fixed her with a look of utter disdain. He knew three women in this row of houses who made excuses like that and he’d never once see any of the husbands actually do it.

"Believe that when I see it." He muttered darkly.

"Your dad did."

"My dad was drinking because he was shit scared my mum could just disappear with me for years or that I might blow up the house; and she didn't help matters."

"You know it's not her fault." Petunia said, typical _women's-lib_ answer. He hadn’t said it was, but there was a lot of history he’d heard them screaming about during arguments enough times that he wasn’t about to go into it now.

"I didn't say it was. But you try coming home to a place in squalor and a wife who treats you like dirt, can't cook and won't learn and lets your kid run wild. No wonder he preferred the pub, at least he got a decent meal there." Severus said. "Vernon doesn't have that excuse... Why did he say he hit you?"

Petunia sighed and pulled a chair out, resting her elbow on the kitchen table and putting her head in her hand for a moment as she considered his question.

"He… I asked him about setting a date and he just… snapped."

"Bullshit." Severus said bluntly. Her head snapped up and he realised she’d put it down to try hide tears forming in her eyes. He crossed the kitchen, tore off a few sheets of kitchen roll and handed them to her absently. He ignored the watery smile of thanks. That wasn’t his concern right now. His concern was getting her away from that lunatic before he took it on himself to hunt the bastard down.

"It's too late now, we're engaged, everyone knows." She told him, sniffing slightly and dabbing her eyes with the tissue.

"It's not too late until you’ve been in front of a priest." Severus answered abruptly, too abruptly. She looked scandalised at the very thought.

"Severus, I can't live with my parents forever!"

"Have you talked to your dad about it?" Doctor Evans would have broken the engagement for her if he knew Vernon had slapped her around, Severus was sure of it.

"Are you joking? he'd probably go after Vernon with a shotgun!"

"What makes you think I need a shotgun." Severus asked, voice tight and jaw set hard. "And anyhow I told my dad he'd kill him before your dad or I got that chance and _he’d happily do the time for it_."

"Severus, stop it. You barely know me, you can't just threaten my fiance."

"I'll threaten anyone who lays hands on an innocent woman and I'll back it up as well. You deserve better than that, Petunia." He was leaning over the table, trying to stop himself pacing a hole in the kitchen lino. She jumped to her feet in response.

"What? _Like you_!" The tone was more hysterical than scathing, it gave too much away and blew apart over a year of the pair of them awkwardly avoiding eye contact and being overly polite. He stared at her for a moment unable to make his brain form any coherent words.

"Why not?" He said eventually, quietly as he straightened up. "I'd never lay a hand on you. I know I'm no big shot businessman but… I mean…"

She was gaping at him. She clearly hadn't expected him to do more than laugh at the pronouncement.

"You're… not joking." The silence hung between them. He realised he really wasn't.

"No.. sorry it's not on my knees in some fancy restaurant or something but no, I'm not joking." The only thing that made sense right now was to be flippant. He was seventeen and he’d just asked a girl to marry him. His head was spinning slightly.

"Severus… I'm already engaged, And... well, it would be a scandal!" He couldn’t help notice that that answer wasn’t a ‘no' and that she'd avoided the main issue of the two of them. 

"So? Look around you. No one here would care about any scandal."

She was still staring at him. It was making him nervous and then his mouth started going before his brain caught up and he trailed off nervously.

"Look, I know it's not ideal, and I'm not exactly rich or anything but once I've graduated, I'm going to be a doctor, Petunia. That's a good life… if you wanted it." 

"What about… Lily?"

"What about her? Do you need your sisters permi…" he paused. "You think I… Petunia, I've never looked twice at Lily, she's… really not for me." He insisted, the idea was ludicrous- it always had been.

"Really? You're not just saying that?" For someone who so easily believed that Vernon Dursley could do no wrong she had a nerve being suspicious of him. Severus found himself forgiving her for the slight almost instantly and accepting that it was a fair question that deserved a straight answer.

"Petunia she's a witch, and I've seen how she is. Even if she wasn't engaged I wouldn't have looked at her. She's too much like my mum, and sorry, but no thanks. But you… honestly, I've been kind of half in love with you for at least a year, and _even if you don't marry me_ , I'm begging you, don't marry that bloke. Don't throw your life away on him."

Petunia seemed to have softened, he half expected her to cry.

"You… really mean it, don't you?"

"Yeah, look, you don't have to give me an answer right now. But think it over. The offer is there." He said, suddenly realising that he was stood in his parents kitchen without so much as a ring. _What had he been thinking?_

"Yes."

"What?"

"I don't need to think about it. I'll marry you, Severus, if you're serious?"

"Of… of course I am," he couldn't help it, sheer relief and joy had him grinning like an idiot, it was only as she said yes that he let himself admit to himself how much he’d wanted this, "you'll have to give me some time to buy a ring and, _oh god,_ I need to talk to your parents and mine and-" he cut off his rambling when she threw herself at him, arms around his neck and kissed him soundly.

"Alright son don't mi- oh, sorry!" Severus and Petunia immediately sprung apart and Severus could have killed his dad. "Ah…"

"Dad?" Severus said and glanced at Petunia, she nodded.

"Going to introduce me to your galfriend then?" He asked with a slightly flippant air. Severus and Petunia exchanged looks.

"Dad, this is Petunia Evans. The girl I think I'm going to marry. Petunia, my dad."

"Well…" Toby looked completely stumped. He fixed Severus with a significant look. "Since when?"

"Since about five minutes ago," Severus said, "when I asked, and she said yes."

"I didn't even know you were dating anyone." Tobias said slowly and Severus paused and shrugged. "You're not pregnant, are you?" He asked Petunia seriously.

"Dad!" Severus declared hotly and Tobias fixed him with an innocent look.

"What? You're seventeen and talking marriage, it's a fair question."

"No sir, I'm not pregnant." Petunia squeaked out.

"Oh… well, then, congratulations.” Dad didn’t seem impressed or convinced, “Word son, in private?"

"I'll just, wait out there shall I?" Petunia asked and Severus nodded and squeezed her hand before she disappeared out the door.

"Son…?" Tobias asked carefully as the door closed. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure dad, I've fancied her for ages," Severus admitted, the adrenaline was definitely loosening his tongue.

"And… does she know that you're… you know?" He mimicked waving a wand vaguely.

"She knows, she's Lily's sister after all."

"And she can live with it?"

"Suppose so, she said yes. Why?"

"It's not exactly easy."

"I'm not mum, I'm not going to lie to her and hide her away dad.” The ‘like mum did to you’ went unsaid but acknowledged all the same, “Look at her. She's gorgeous, clever and _wow_ can she cook." Dad smirked and Severus felt the flush rise up his cheeks when he realised what he'd just said out loud.

"Bit posh, int she?" It felt like dad wanted to ask something else as well but had refrained.

"Says the bloke who married a private school girl." Severus retorted. "Look, I need to ask her dad and there's some other stuff, it's sort of complicated but…" he couldn't help staring at the door. Somehow his stars had aligned today and he wasn't going to throw the chance away.

"Complicated? How?" Severus hesitated, he wasn't sure he wanted to tell dad the whole truth in case it turned him on her, but he might need the ally.

"It's… she's already engaged," he said quietly and flinched pre-emptively, waiting for the explosion that came a second later.

"You what!"

"Dad," Severus hissed, "I know, I know, but…"

"You've got three seconds to explain yourself, I didn't raise you to be chasing married women…"

"She's not married, and if you knew what I know you'd understand."

"Then make me understand. Because right now I'm wondering what that grammar school been teaching you to make you think it's alright to go after another man's bird." Dad declared, he was talking too fast and his voice was rising and Severus had to actively convince himself not to step back out of Dad’s reach.

"He hit her!" Severus finally bit out. "He's been engaged to her for a year, he drinks too much when he eats at her parents house, and he hit her. He's not like you, he didn't have a good reason, he made excuses and she nearly fell for them. I couldn't… I won't let her marry him."

"So what, you're just going to step in? Who is he?"

"Her boss. He hit her and he's her boss and I told you it's complicated."

"Damn right it is. Are you mad?" The anger seemed to have gone from dad to be replaced with confusion and Severus let himself breathe a little easier. If dad was going to swing for him he’d have done it by now.

"Dad…” He stopped to pick his words, “I'm seventeen, I'm not going to stand here and wax lyrical about loving her for you to laugh at me for being a stupid kid. I just know that I won't let her marry him, and she made me so happy when she said she'd marry me, I'm surprised the toaster didn't blow up." Severus said urgently, he needed dad to understand and get it. And fast. "I would have gone after him even if she said no to me. I want her to be happy, dad, more than anything, and she's giving me the chance to make her happy."

"What about school, uni…" And Severus finally understood, dad really was just confused.

"What about it? I'll still go to uni, I'll have a wife to support so I'm not about to throw away the chance to make a good life for us. I'd really like you to trust me on this one dad. Just give me a chance. Let me try. _Please_?"

Dad seemed to stare at him for what could have been several sunlit days.

"You're actually serious. _You’re sure she’s not pregnant_?"

"I am. Deadly. And no she’s really not." Dad seemed to consider him for a moment like he was trying to pick a spot on the Pools or pick a horse for the next race.

"This bloke she's about to piss off, is he dangerous?"

"Nothing I can't handle." Severus said immediately, Vernon Dursley wasn't exactly a big bloke and what size he did have was mostly fat. Dad eyed him. “Really dad, I’ve taken blokes with a lot more sense of how to throw a punch than him.”

"Well… if you're going to go see her old man, and marry her, you're going need a ring." He said eventually like he couldn’t quite believe the words that were coming out of his mouth. "I've got my mum's old one, it's nothing special…"

"You're…” Severus felt his jaw drop, “you're serious?"

"If you are." Dad couldn’t seriously be asking him this question, he’d been expecting a row and a lecture about getting into lifelong commitments when he hadn’t lived. It felt weird. He wasn’t sure what he had said to dad to make him go along with it or why he was questioning his good fortune… he just was.

"I really am dad. I swear."

"Wait here." Dad didn't give him a chance to answer before he was out of the kitchen and climbing the stairs. Severus nearly jumped out of his skin when dad came back even though he’d been staring at the door and willing him to reappear.

"Son… tell me this ain't a game to you?" Severus could feel the weight of dad’s tone, he looked so scared it made Severus want to tuck tail and run, dad didn’t so scared, not like this.

"It's not dad… I really, I can see my entire life with her. I want it to be with her."Apparently it was the right thing to say because dad seemed to lose about ten stone of weight from where it had been sat on his shoulders and the set of his expression cracked into a small but genuine smile.

"Then here." Dad put a dark blue velvet box on the table and Severus picked it up. His hands were shaking. "Might need to get it resize to her." Dad said as Severus popped the box open. He'd never seen the ring before. It was a gorgeous yellow gold with a white diamond in the middle of four emeralds.

"This is… it's perfect dad. I can’t-"

"If you love her then take it. You can't go to her father without a ring. You're better than that."

Severus swallowed thickly and closed the box. His throat suddenly felt very tight as he finally realised that at some point dad had stopped treating him like a kid and started treating him like a man and he hadn’t even noticed.

"Thanks dad. I'll pay you back, I'll…"

"You'll go to uni, go be a doctor and give me grandkids and do better by them than I did by you. That's how you'll pay me back."

Severus couldn't help it, he was used to being a bit of a soft touch, god knew he'd had his fair share of teasing at school about it, but he was surprised that he felt close to tears. He looked away and pinched his eyes for a second before he got control of himself.

"If I do half as well as you have, your grand kids will be fine." He managed quietly and it was dad's turn to actually sniff and wave him off in a gesture designed entirely to hide the emotion in his own heart.

"Go on, get out of here, don't keep her waiting." Dad said thickly and Severus nodded.

"Thanks dad."

-

He felt like a different person stepping into the living room, like he’d aged ten years talking to dad, Petunia looked so anxious he just wanted to hug her and promise to protect her forever. He smiled and nodded and she flew across the room and hugged him again. When they stepped apart Severus swallowed.

"We should… go see your dad. Ask his blessing…" He managed, it was the least he could do for the man who did so much and had taken such an interest in him and his education. He already felt guilty that they hadn’t done this the old fashioned way and asked him first.

"Severus you don't have to do that!" He half expected her to admonish him that it was the seventies but he didn’t care, some things were more important and it was a matter of respect.

"Petunia… I'm going to marry you. But I'm going to do it properly, with your dad's blessing."

"You think he'll say yes?" She asked.

"Oh, _god_ , I hope so." Severus breathed. He paused and bit his lip with his bottom teeth. "Listen, i… none of this was really planned but… my dad just gave me my grandma's engagement ring for you," he said quietly and Petunia drew in a sharp intake of breath, "will you let me… do this a bit more properly?" She swallowed almost nervously and nodded as he stepped back and tried to kneel without tipping over. God, he felt clumsy and awkward. He nearly dropped the ring box trying to make it open.

"Petunia Evans," why hadn't he got a drink when he was in the kitchen? His throat was raw. "Will you marry me?" His voice sounded really croaky.

She nodded again, he was sure he heard her say something that sounded like a half squealed yes, and something about beautiful, from behind her hand and he slipped the ring on her finger, finally pulling her into a proper kiss. It must have gone on too long because dad coughed and Severus felt slightly stupid, he had forgotten that dad was probably stood right there and had probably watched all of it.

"Whoops?" He whispered to Petunia and she giggled, wow that was endearing. He might never get sick of seeing her smile and giggle like that.

"I promise, this Saturday, I'll take you somewhere really nice to celebrate, anywhere you want." He half whispered to her, their noses still almost touching.

"You don't have to-"

"I want to. We need to get that ring fitted anyway, if you like it?" He said, taking her hand and lifting it up.

"Of course I do, it's beautiful!" She proclaimed with a shy glance at dad who smiled when Severus looked up at him.

"Suits you lassie." That was his dad’s blessing sorted, at least, if the ring hadn’t been proof enough.

"Uncle Steve is holding a car I like for me on the understanding that I passed today. I'll go pay him for it, get it all insured and we'll go for a drive, anywhere you want," she smiled and buried her face in his neck, he half heard her whisper his name.

"OK." She said softly.

" _Really_?"

"Yes, really," she swatted at him and giggled again. He stole another glance at dad over her shoulder. Dad wasn't even trying to pretend like he wasn't crying. He nodded and Severus mouthed a thank you. Another nod.

"You two better go, it's nearly five o'clock, go see her old man and make sure he's alright with this."

Severus's heart dropped. _What if he wasn't?_

"Y-yeah… we should do that." He said finally. No. He wasn't about to bottle it now. Not now he was so close. "I…" he looked down at himself. He was not dressed anywhere near properly. "I should at least put a shirt on." He said, voice slightly too high and slightly croaking like it was about to break. Petunia squeaked and dad nodded.

"Go on, I'll keep your girl company. Put a decent pair of trousers on too instead of those old jeans."

Severus flew up the stairs and got changed in a whirlwind. Or at least he tried to. Three shirts ended up crumpled on his bed. None of them looked right. He couldn't wear a school shirt. Eventually he pulled out a light blue shirt and ran an ironing spell over it to make sure it was right. Thank god he'd shaved this morning. He grabbed a comb and slipped into the bathroom, wetting it and dragging it through his hair to make it behave. Luckily, mum hadn't got her way about making him not cut it again until he was seventeen like the old purebloods; School had sent a letter home pointing out the grooming standards in the charter after Mister Collins had said something. Severus had tried to explain that his mum came from a weird culture, though not very hard because he had wanted a proper haircut, to which mister Collins had snorted knowingly and demanded a parents signature confirming that they were going to comply. Severus made a mental note to thank the old Chemistry teacher after this, he did not want to show up asking doctor Evans for his blessing to marry Petunia looking like some long haired pillock with no respect.

Eventually he looked as good as he was going to get, made sure he had his wand just in case doctor Evans pulled a shotgun on him, and headed downstairs. He didn't stop to wonder if Doctor Evans even had a shotgun and he wasn't about to ask. That man was scary in defence of his daughters. Vernon Dursely would find that out soon enough, Severus was sure.

"Will I do?" He asked awkwardly and dad nodded. Petunia smiled and nodded as well. He let out a nervous breath. "Let's get this over with then?"

"If you're not back by nine should I assume he's shot you?" Tobias asked and Severus fixed him with a horrified look. "I'm joking son, calm down, it'll be fine. Get out of here before your mum gets back from shopping, we'll handle her later." He said pointedly and Severus's heart sank.

"Handle her?" Petunia asked quietly.

"She always wanted me to marry a witch, where she ever thought I'd meet one I've no idea." He told her. "Don't worry about it, I'm not." He tried to lie but Petunia huffed at him, clearly seeing through it. "OK, maybe I am, but it won't stop me."

"Promise?"

He reached down and touched the ring on her finger before squeezing her hand.

"Promise. Let's go."

They walked in an amicable silence but Severus couldn't help being slightly nervous as they got in range of her parents house.

"I'll talk to him first," she said suddenly, "tell him about Vernon and why… why that's not going to happen. It'll make it easier for you."

"Yeah… that's… probably best." He felt like a coward letting her go in there first, but he wasn’t sure there was a better way to do it. It was better coming from her. She was doctor Evans’s daughter, after all. Severus was just the raggedy kid he’d taken under his wing out of the kindness of his heart.

Severus had no idea what Petunia said to her dad but they were in his office for nearly an hour. He came out looking stern and Severus wanted to run and hide but he made himself stand up from where he'd been drinking tea under the watchful gaze of Mrs Evans and follow the man into his study.

"Drink?" He asked as he held up a decanter and Severus shook his head.

"No thank you sir, I think I need my wits about me today." Severus said carefully and doctor Evans nodded, he already knew Severus hardly touched the stuff and knew why. Seeing the way dad had been had put him off for life unless it was a very special occasion. The doctor was even smiling before Severus realised he'd admitted he was scared. He bit his lip bit, Doctor Evans didn't say anything more on that. He was sipping a dark amber liquid from a thick tumbler for a second and Severus waited until he set it down on the corner of his desk.

"I'll get straight to the point." He said gruffly and Severus had to swallow back a sick feeling. "My daughter tells me she's breaking her engagement of over a year to marry you, and she'd like my blessing."

"Yes sir." Silence. "Sir I.. I owe you an apology. It was spur of the moment. If I had planned it I would have come to you first. Please don't think I meant any disrespect, to you or to Petunia." Dammit Severus hadn’t meant to just spill his guts like that. Doctor Evans didn’t seem to mind but he still felt really stupid.

"We have all watched you two dance around each other, but still, this is sudden.” Yeah, that was the understatement of the century, “Would you care to explain?"

"Well, sir… you know why she doesn't want to marry that other bloke." Severus had to choose his words carefully now.

"She… did say." A shadow crossed doctor Evans' expression and Severus swallowed.

" I couldn't watch her marry him once I found out what he had done…” Wasn’t that the truth, “I had to try."

"I am sure you did…. You know there will be whispers that you became entangled sooner."

"Let them whisper, I don't care, I'll marry her anyway and I'll never lay a hand on her in violence. Please. It would mean so much, to both of us, to have your support, sir."

"You are seventeen, you haven't even left school. How do you plan to provide for her?" Well, at least the Doctor was taking him seriously and not laughing him out the door.

"With...with your blessing, sir, I'm applying to the universities we talked about last year, to be a doctor. I have a part time job and savings. Enough I think to put down a payment on a house, it won't be anything special but I won't make her destitute and I'd make sure I could afford it. I've got ways I can make money legally while I study to keep the bills paid." _Be practical, Severus, love doesn’t pay the bills_. His internal voice sounded oddly like dad for a minute there.

"She wants children, she's very motherly…" Severus waited until he was sure Doctor Evans meant him to reply.

"I'm sure she is. And once I'm a fully qualified doctor she can have as many kids as we can afford." She could have anything she wanted that was in Severus’s power to give her.

"You seem very confident."

"So did you when you told me to make the applications last year sir,” Severus bit his lip, too fast and too blunt, he paused and took a breath, “and if being a doctor doesn't work I can be a mechanic. It's not glamorous but it's good honest work. I won't let her down."

Doctor Evans seemed to be thinking to himself.

"You gave her an engagement ring." He said. Was that a question? Severus wasn’t sure.

"My dad gave it to me when he walked in on us… err… kissing, sir, it was his mother's. She likes it but we need to get it resized." He was rambling again. He really needed to kick that habit, maybe take up smoking more or something. Anything to do with his hands and mouth and stop him talking so much.

"You know, I've been waiting for over a year for her to come home with a ring on her finger." The doctor said quietly more to his tumbler than to Severus before he drank from it again. Severus stared, it was only now occurring to him that Petunia didn't have a ring from Vernon. Even before what dad had said earlier Severus was glad he hadn't realised sooner. He might have charmed a very tight ring around Vernon's very thick neck and let him choke. The engagement hadn't been worth anything to him- _clearly_.

"What would you have done, if your father didn't have a ring?" Doctor Evans wasn’t even looking at him as he twirled the glass absently and watched the amber liquid roll around the inside.

"Sir…?" His expression must have betrayed what a weird question that was.

"Humour me?" The man asked, glancing up at him with an apologetic look, as if he knew exactly what had confused Severus about the question.

"I'd have taken her shopping for one on Saturday," he answered, "I'm planning on buying a car Saturday morning. It's all ready to go." Severus answered guardedly, where was the doctor going with this?

"Oh really?"

"Yes sir, my godfather is a mechanic, he buys and sells them. He promised me it if I passed my test and could afford it. It's second hand but it's a good runner and well kept. I can afford it and I did pass today, as you know, sir." Severus said carefully. This felt like a test and he wasn’t sure if he was passing or not.

"I would have conditions.... I expect you to graduate before you have children, and to pass your university probation or else be working full time before you set a wedding date." Severus let out a relieved woosh of breath.

"Of. Of course sir." That was just common sense. _Where was the catch, it had to be there._

Doctor Evans nodded.

"Do that,” Severus waited for the doctor to gather his thoughts, his nerves were on edge, “and I will pay for the wedding, it's only proper." It was like someone had punched a hole in his lung he was so surprised.

"You… you don't ha-" Doctor Evans put a hand up and Severus clamped his mouth shut.

"She is my daughter, I want to, and frankly, Severus, I'm relieved you finally made her see sense about that man."

Severus let out a relieved huff. That immediately gave the impression that Doctor Evans had told Petunia at least once that he didn’t like Vernon.

"Yes sir." He agreed and doctor Evans let out a small laugh more to himself than anything else.

"Go on, let's go tell her she can marry you with my blessing before she chews her poor mother's arm off with anxiety."

Severus coughed back a tiny laugh. He stopped with his hand on the door when doctor Evans spoke again.

"You know, she's my daughter but she's a bit highly strung."

"Sir, I'm seventeen and applying to university to be a doctor. If she wasn't she'd drive me mad for being too laid back." Severus pointed out and doctor Evans laughed aloud as he rose from his desk chair.

"Well, at least you know yourself, I'll give you that, son. Now tell me about this car of yours," He asked as he came closer and Severus smiled. Dad had gone nuts that Severus let himself get emotionally attached to a car but he hadn’t been able to help it.

"It's five years old, a Cortina XL, so it should last a good while and then some." Severus started to say as they left the room. He cut off as they returned to find Petunia and her mother whispering.

"Severus? Daddy?" Poor Petunia looked like she was about to need smelling salts as she moved to stand. Severus offered her a small smile and a tiny nod.

"He knows my conditions, but yes, you have my blessing." Severus was glad Petunia flung herself at her father, the shriek she let out as she did made him worry the old man might not take the force of her landing but he held steady- just.

"Co-conditions?" She asked when she pulled away after half squeezing the life from him.

"I'm to look after you," Severus said with a slight smile, she didn’t need the details just now, "and either get established at uni or be working if that doesn't work out before we set a date." Petunia nodded frantically and Severus was swept up in celebrations and Mrs Evans calling him 'dear' and patting his shoulder affectionately. It was nice. It was much better than he had to look forward to when he got home to face his own mum.

"I should… head home. Let my parents know everything is OK?" Severus said eventually. He didn’t want to.

"Oh don't leave yet dear, Lily is due home in ten minutes or so I'm sure she'll want to congratulate you herself."

Severus exchanged glances with Petunia. He wasn't sure how Lily was going to react. She didn't seem to react well to Petunia and Severus even being friends of sorts before though she seemed to have grown used to Severus’s presence in the house in the last year he’d been shadowing Doctor Evans about his work.

"Want me to handle it?" He asked quietly.

"She's my sister, and I'm a muggle, she won't hex me." Petunia answered in kind and Severus smirked.

"I'm faster and more powerful, she won't hex me either." He shot back.

"Yes well I'd rather you didn't test that theory, _thank you._ " Petunia said primly and Severus smiled as the door opened and Lily stepped in with her boyfriend in tow. Severus hadn't seen him in a few months. He hadn't changed much. Like Severus he'd had a growth spurt, unlike Severus he still hadn't learned how to comb his hair properly.

"Wha- what's going on? Severus what are you doing here?"

"I'm here for Petunia," Severus said firmly and Lily's boyfriend narrowed his eyes calculatingly as he glanced around the room.

"Lily… I'm not engaged to Vernon any more," Petunia said softly and Lily stared at her, "Severus asked me to marry him today, and I said yes."

The whole room seemed to freeze.

"Sev…"

"You heard her right." Severus said stiffly, waiting for the inevitable.

"But…" Lily didn't seem to have words, her boyfriend caught Severus's eye and nodded at a corner of the room. Severus didn't move from where he was holding Petunia's hand until after Lily grinned and squealed and started demanding to know how long it had been going on and ' _wont it be wonderful we'll all be family_ '... Severus stepped aside, knowing full well doctor Evans was watching him.

"What?"

"She's a Muggle?"

"So." Severus answered. "Why do you care?" The Potter’s were a light family, anyhow this one was a bigot Severus would be having words with his future sister-in-law about her choice of boyfriend.

"Honestly, I don't, but she's Lily's sister and you…" He seemed to shrug awkwardly.

"What about me?" When had Severus ever given the impression he had a problem with muggles?

"Your mother is a Prince, _right_?"

"She was… they disowned her…"

"And now our cousins are death eaters, which makes both of us targets, and b _oth of them_."

"Lily can look after herself,” Potter nodded, “and I can and will protect Petunia from any jumped up wizard who comes anywhere near us."

"They're crazy, they've got people our age doing things that are… well…" he pulled a face and Severus sighed. Doctor Evans seemed to be listening closely to them.

"Lily told me. I don't care. They won't hurt Petunia, I won't let them." Severus said firmly. James Potter seemed to like that answer. He seemed the type. Severus noticed Doctor Evans shift as if he’d heard what he wanted to hear and was now more interested in watching his daughters again.

"We should probably make peace, if we're going to be family." James offered quietly and Severus nodded. "Should have known you fancied her the way you defended her last year." He added with a friendly smirk and Severus huffed.

"No that's just how I defend anyone you insult in their own home. It's called having manners."

"Petunia this ring is at least a size too big, you'll lose it!" Lily declared loudly

"Ouch, yeah, OK I deserve that. Listen. I know you said you can handle it. But if you need a second wand…" he said quietly, Severus wondered if he wanted to be an auror, he seemed to act like one, always considering danger first.

"We haven't had it resized yet, give him a chance Lily." Petunia huffed and Lily smiled.

"Lily loves her sister." James said as if that explained everything, and watching Lily and Petunia with their heads together over the ring on Petunia's finger and giggling Severus understood completely. "Truce?"

Severus nodded and took the offered handshake.

"Truce."

"Why don't I resize it?"

" _You_?" Severus asked sharply, looking up as he let go of Potter’s hand.

"It's a simple shrinking charm, Sev, I'm surprised you didn't do it yourself." Lily said.

"I didn't even think to use magic on it." He glanced at Petunia. "It's up to you. I can have a band put inside it on Saturday or it can be charmed."

"Ooh let me do it, to show how much I love the idea of you two being married?" Lily pushed and Severus half tilted his head at Petunia.

"It's your grandmother's ring, Severus," Lily cooed over that, "what if the magic breaks it?"

"It won't," Severus said, "it's fourteen carat gold, it will just redistribute the gold into it and shrink it down so none of the content is lost."

"What does that mean?" Petunia asked, glancing at her father who looked equally confused and Severus realised, they weren’t exactly likely to understand theoretical charms.

"By the time she's finished it'll be closer to twenty two carat gold and will fit," Severus said simply.

"Oh… if you don't mind."

"It's your ring, Petunia, it's up to you." Severus told her and Petunia blushed and nodded at Lily. The ring resized with little fanfare and Petunia smiled and hugged her sister. Lily had done a perfect job of resizing it.

"Ooh, do you want a charm so it doesn't ever get lost too?" Lily asked and Severus half smiled when Petunia nodded excitedly. It was nice to see them not arguing over magic for once. Doctor Evans was watching them slightly misty eyed.


	8. Summer of '78

He should have known it was all too perfect. When he finally walked home mum was waiting in the living room with dad who looked really quite sheepish. It was unnerving.

"You will not marry that  _ girl _ , Severus." 

"Hello to you too, how was shopping?" Severus answered with an impatient tone and mum snarled at him. 

"Don't you dare be so rude to me, I said you will not marry that girl."

"And how exactly do you plan on stopping me, mum?" Severus asked. He'd expected mum to get mad. He hadn't expected her to come at him looking quite that wild.

"I… I'll  _ disown _ you."

"Like you've got anything I want to inherit." 

"Severus." Dad said warningly and half shook his head. Mum must have  _ really _ lost it on dad.

"I'll never speak to you again!"

"Hurry up and start then, just like your parents did to you." Severus shot back. He wasn't going to take it. Mum and that tone when she talked about Petunia. That look on her face. The same look the McGonagall woman had sported so long ago now. Like she thought she was cut above this place and these people, Severus' people,  _ Petunia _ .

"She's a Muggle! She'll never understand you."

"Well so far in my life the only person who hasn't understood me is  _ you.  _ Unless you want me to believe you actually regret marrying a Muggle yourself?" He'd been thinking about this conversation on the walk home. Knowing it was coming and he'd decided that this might just make or break his relationship with his mother and made his peace with that.

"I'm different… I at least had the chance to go to Hogwarts…"

"So did I. I turned it down and I don't regret it. The wizards are at war! Why would you want me to be part of that?"

"But… we aren't made that way, we're not muggles Severus, we're different to them." 

" _ You _ are. You weren't raised with muggles, you don't know how to live like one properly. I do. And I prefer them to any magic and I'll snap my wand before I break my word to Petunia." And that really should have been the end of any attempt to make him delve deeper into magic. 

"But Severus you could be a great wizard."

"I DON'T WANT TO BE A GREAT WIZARD." Severus finally roared. They were calling the lunatic who lead the death eaters a great wizard. They called Dumbledore a great wizard, that guy, who couldn't keep his students safe in his own school from being tortured but was very good at hushing it up, who put a werewolf in a school full of kids. "I want you to leave me alone, I don't want to spend my life waving my wand about like an idiot with a screw loose. Accept it mum. I'm not going to suddenly turn around and be your ticket back in with your death eater family. I  _ never _ was." 

Mum stared at him for several seconds. She seemed surprised. He wasn't sure how. He'd been saying the same thing when he was eleven.

"Well. That's me told. So much for trying to be a good mother and give you good opportunities."

"You just threatened to disown me because I've met someone I love and want to spend my life with. How is that being a good mother?" She had spent too many years guilt tripping him, he was no longer affected by it or willing to let it pass. The fact that dad hadn't yelled at him for talking back to her told Severus all he needed to know about whose side dad was really on.

"He did it right Eileen, leave him to make him own bed." Dad said quietly and mum glared at him. 

"He's seventeen!"

"And if I'd gone to Hogwarts you would have expected me to at least be engaged to someone by now." Severus pointed out.

"That would've been different." She insisted and Severus fought the urge to roll his eyes.

"Why? Because the girl I might have fallen for wouldn't know how to cook and clean without random bits of pig Latin and a pretty stick?" 

Mum looked like he'd slapped her and he pressed on, she needed to understand that he just didn't rate magic that highly and never had. For most things it was a useless if not downright dangerous alternative to doing something with your own two hands.

"Magic might have it's uses, but you have no idea how grateful I am every single day that Hogwarts sent that McGonagall woman and I saw what they're like before I got trapped into it. God only knows where and what I'd be now if I had gone there instead." 

"You would have been a  _ fully _ qualified, of age, wizard with excellent prospects."

"Mum, I've been sitting NEWT exams for the last four years around school. I'm better qualified than most of the professors at Hogwarts and my prospects are amazing. You need to stop pretending that I lost anything but the chance to end up some fucked up death eater or dead by not going to Hogwarts."

"Oi!  _ Language _ . That's your mother you're talking to." Dad jumped in and Severus sighed.

"Lily is just fine, and she's muggleborn." Mum said thinly and Severus pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Lily is planning on going into hiding with her  _ pureblood _ fiancé the minute she leaves school. Lily can't walk down the street without jumping at loud noises. Lily is lucky to be in one piece, she was this close," he swung his hand upwards, holding his fingers millimeters apart in front of his nose, "to being the wrong  _ mudblood _ in the wrong place and having to walk around with the word carved into her chest for the rest of her life."

"Severus! I won't hear that language."

"No, you'd have just had me go to a school when I wasn't even worth calling that, well this is my line. I'm not a wizard. I never was. I'm going to marry Petunia and be a doctor or a mechanic or whatever doesn't mean I have to run around waving a wand because I don't know how to do anything for myself. If you don't like it kick me out."

He waited, she didn't speak.

" _ Well _ , do I need to go pack or not?"

Eventually, after staring at him for far too long she sighed and her shoulders slumped.

"No." 

-

Mum didn't talk to him for ages. At all. His exams were over before she bothered to speak to him again and he was still seething. If it wasn't for dad he'd have walked out weeks ago, and gone to live down at the YMCA, rather than have to put up with her puppy dog eyes like he'd done anything wrong every time she was in a room with him. At least now he had the school break to get things sorted. He was working three days a week with uncle Steve in the garage, another two up at the mill and spending the rest with Petunia. It was something like bliss to have money in his pocket and time to spare. He didn't know what doctor Evans had been talking about, Petunia was incredibly easygoing and occasionally spontaneous in ways that made Severus laugh.

"Let's go to the beach," she said one day in the middle of June. She was laid on the picnic blanket next to him after they had driven up onto the Moors, the transistor radio just about picking up Alan Freeman on Radio One once Severus had managed to get a signal. He'd pulled his shirt off when it was quite clear the heat was not about to let up.

"What? What for?"

"For a day away, to have fun. On your next day off work let's go to the beach." She said again and Severus blinked.

"I don't think I've ever been to the beach before." 

"It's not that far, an hour's drive or so." 

"Really? I always assumed it was miles away." He said absently and Petunia softened and touched his arm before her expression set into well-meaning belligerence.

"That's it, we're going to the beach. You need to go at least once." 

"What makes you think I'll be able to find it?" 

"You found Manchester well enough." She said pointedly and Severus groaned, for as long as he lived he hoped to never to have to drive into the middle of Manchester again- and that was before he'd even found the place for the interview. The city was a maze. Petunia laughed at his expression.

"An hour to find a parking space Petunia, an  _ hour _ ." Her giggling intensified. He couldn't help it, he softened. "Fine, we'll go to the beach on Wednesday." He relented and she let out a tiny whoop and he grinned. 

"You'll love it. Who knows the way you're tanning you might be as dark as your dad when we get back." 

Severus blinked at her, surprised and lifted his arm to look at it. He was even more surprised that it wasn't the same pale he'd always been. 

"Bloody hell." He muttered to himself, even as a kid he'd never tanned like this- but then he'd never spent so many days out in the sun and not cooped up in a book or dressed in clothes that covered him all but head to toe before. 

"What's wrong? You look healthy, Severus!" 

"Yeah, yeah," he murmured still staring at his arm.

"So, beach on your next day off?"

"Yeah, yeah, you know, it's a good job I love you." He said absently and Petunia paused.

"W-what?" 

Severus frowned and blinked and then realised what he'd said. He'd never actually told Petunia he loved her before. Never really let himself think it too plainly either. He'd thought he'd shown her well enough, days spent together, trips wherever she wanted to go, small gifts and the effort he was making to save, find a house and with her parents. He'd thought it was obvious but judging by her expression apparently it wasn't.

"You know that's the first time…" 

"I know," Severus said softly, "suppose it's a good sign I can say it before we're properly married." He added awkwardly and tried not to stare at the pink blush and bright smile she had on him. Eventually he looked away before he did or said something even stupider.

"Severus?" She said quietly and he glanced at her as he fiddled with a packet of cigarettes.

"Yeah?" He asked as he put one between his lips, it bounced as the word pushed around it.

"You know that I love you too, don't you?" He froze and pulled the cig from his lips slowly as he processed that, smile tugging at his lips.

"Well," he said lightly, "I didn't think you were marrying me for my money." She tittered and smacked his arm playfully. 

"Trust you to ruin a beautiful moment," she teased and Severus smiled, put the cigarette back in the packet and pushed it into his pocket as he laid back on the blanket. Petunia shifted and put her head on his chest. How had he not noticed how dark he was compared to her this week?

"Actually," he said absently stroking her shoulder with his finger, "not sure anything could ruin this moment." He felt her smile against his chest. He glanced up and spotted a man walking his dog and grinned, an idea forming in his mind. The dog had seen them and run over anyway and he sat up to pet it absently, it was a monster of a German shepherd but seemed placid and like it just wanted to play. The owner was calling out and shouting and Severus raised a hand. When he met them he was panting heavily.

"Sorry about him, he smells food," the man gestured at their sandwich boxes, "and he's off."

"It's fine," Severus answered smiling as Petunia cooed over the 'puppy' next to him, "apparently we're both dog people." He answered. "What's his name?"

"When he's not being a little bastard his name's Sparky."

"He's gorgeous." Severus chuckled lightly at the owner's exasperated tone as the dog nudged him. 

"He's running me ragged is what he is." The man said. Petunia was still cooing.

"He's got a friend for life now." Severus said with a smile and the stranger chuckled along with him. 

"Can I give him some water?" Petunia asked. "He's panting horribly." 

"So would you if you'd run that far that fast." Severus muttered and the man offered his hand.

"I'm Joe."

"Severus." He responded taking it. He noted the surprised look at his unusual name and rolled his eyes. "Yeah  _ I know _ . Can she give him the water?" He asked and the man nodded. "Do you want a drink?" Severus asked and held out a random can of the pop. The man took it with a grateful look.

"Thanks." 

"Severus, pass me that container to put it in." Severus handed Petunia the container she was flapping her hand at. 

"You two out for a picnic?" He asked and Severus gestured absently. 

"Any chance you can do me a favour?" He asked and reached for the camera. "Picture of us?" He said holding it up and Joe reached out to take it as Petunia squealed, the dog had decided he wanted the water as it was being poured and had begun to lick at the stream of it coming out of the bottle- getting it all over her. Her squeal turned to laughter as the owner grabbed his dog and pulled him back with a stern word about manners that the dog clearly didn't understand and didn't care. Eventually she set the container down and the dog started lapping at it happily.

"Come here Ny," Severus said and slung a lazy arm around Petunia's shoulder and nodded as the man raised the camera. "Smile." The dog nosed her and Petunia giggled right on cue as the camera flashed and Severus broke into an amused grin at her antics.

"Thank you!" Severus said as he took the camera back, still laughing to himself and half shaking his head in confusion and surprise at how much Petunia loved the dog. 

"You're welcome." 

"Thanks for the drink," he said, raising the can in a kind of salute and calling his dog as Petunia petted it one last time. 

"No problem, all the best mate." Severus called out as the dog took off after a random squirrel and his owner followed.

**The beach**

"Come on Severus at least get your feet wet!" 

Severus laughed and tried to duck away and hide his book when she splashed a handful of seawater at him playfully.

"I'm happy watching you," he called back and her laughter filled the mostly empty beach. 

"Scaredy cat!" His laughter joined hers as he finished off an ice-cream and turned a page. 

"Keep trying," he called out and more water splashed in his face. He was too busy watching her wading in, skirt girded up like some sort of Spartan girl to notice the man watching them, well, watching him really. Eventually Petunia tired herself out and flopped down next to Severus on the towel he'd bought in some shop on the pier along with batteries for the radio.

She was gazing around as she sipped at the slightly warm can of pop and Severus felt her freeze.

"Severus," she said quietly, tone sharp with fear that made him look up immediately from trying to get the top ten broadcast.

"What?"

"Severus, isn't that Vernon?" He looked over, immediately tense. Petunia had been getting vaguely threatening crank phonecalls and heavy breathers on her father's phone number for weeks. He picked up his shirt and shook it absently.

"What are the odds?" She asked, voice weak as she watched him getting closer.

"Not ones I would bet on, and I backed a hundred to one long shot in the national this year." He pulled the shirt over his head, not really caring that it was covered in sand.

"You liked the name and it's the national." 

Severus wasn't listening. 

"Whoever he is he's watching us, stay here." He said as he moved to stand.

"Severus," she hissed, "he's twice your size!" 

"So?" 

"What if…"

" _ What if _ \- nothing, I can take him if I have to." Severus said. He didn't get chance to do more than stand up before he realised the man was stomping towards them.

"Oi! That's my woman you're canoodling with!" 

"Actually," Severus answered with a sneer, "you'll find it _ 's my grandmother's ring on her finger."  _

Vernon roared something unrepeatable about him and swung for him, Severus ducked easily and landed his fist in the man's jaw; sending him reeling. For someone so heavily built he went down surprisingly easy and with the kind of cry a first former would have been ashamed of not least because there were third formers at school who could have taken that punch and stayed upright; Severus knew because he had joined in helping to run the boxing club and teach them. 

"Walk. Away. Dursley. There's nothing for you here." Severus declared as the great prat held his jaw tenderly and glared. Severus was struck by how much of an overgrown child this man was, he even looked the part with the round pink face and soft hands like he'd never done a proper day's work in his life. Severus was one of the few at school who didn't have hands like that, and he'd learned that any of them who were proud of that fact weren't people he chose to mix with.

"I don't take orders from seventeen year olds..."

"You can't take a punch from one either, don't make me hit you twice, Dursley, you might not come round before the tide comes in." Severus snapped. 

"This isn't over." He said something else, under his breath, and he was lucky Severus didn't pick up a jam jar from the picnic and smash it over his head just for the sheer irony of it.

"Oh but it is Dursley, I'll pretend I didn't hear that. And you stop calling her home as well. Her father is a doctor, he needs that line clear and I know three blokes with solicitor fathers who would have your shirt for the family if someone doesn't get through in time." He said pointedly and the man just looked confused that the poor kid who had just walloped him even knew what a solicitor was. 

"Are you suggesting I would…" he actually looked offended.

"I'm not suggesting, I'm telling you that you're a fucking  _ thick cunt _ to have not thought of the risk to the man's patients before you started clogging up his phone line at all hours." Severus rarely got that blue with his language but he'd been itching after Dursley for months now and had only not gone to find the man because he'd promised Petunia he wouldn't. This didn't count, this was self-defence.

Dursley finally scrambled to his feet and backed away grumbling. Severus let out a low sigh of relief, that could have ended much worse. Petunia was staring at you.

"Did he really call you…"

"Had to happen some time, Ny," he said absently, "I wasn't going to be a pasty glass of tall milk all my life with my dad." It wasn't something he wanted to discuss. He'd spent his life passing for white when he hadn't been in the sun, but it made him wonder how many people who hadn't met his dad had realised he wasn't and what that might have changed. He didn't want to dwell on it too much. 

-

"Damn son, get inside you've caught the sun!" Dad declared and Severus didn't need telling twice. He hadn't realised his skin could go that dark that quickly. No wonder Vernon had defaulted to calling him  _ that. _

"Day at the beach, dad, what do you expect?"

Dad was staring at him as if his entire worldview had been rocked.

"What?"

"Nothin, just… no way you ain't my boy." He said and Severus frowned. Of course he'd grown up hearing the snide comments and rumours about how unlikely it was that dad stepped off the boat and had a white kid with a posh bird but he'd dismissed it. It wasn't like there was any other man in his life who had done so much for him. Dad had got into the odd fight about it over the years and Severus had always had the same answer for the racists who tried to make a big deal of it.

"Sorry? Did someone say there were someone else who broke his back my entire life to keep a roof over me head and clothes on me back?" 

Dad snorted at having that answer shot at him and shook his head slightly. 

"Your teachers ain't gonna recognise you in school."

"I can handle it, my colour had to come out at some time, right?" 

"It ain't going to be easy, you know? You grew up looking white and now you look like I did after a couple of years in this country." 

"When is anything? It's who I am dad, if they don't like it they can lump it."

**August**

"Severus?" He made a point of spending as much time as possible with Petunia with summer coming to an end and work at the mill hard to come by. 

"Yeah?" He asked as he threw the end of a cigarette away in the general direction of a drain.

"I… wanted to talk to you about something but…"

Severus frowned, it wasn't like Petunia to hesitate to talk to him.

"About what?"

"Well… I had an idea, I mean I've had it for ages but well, Vernon laughed and told me there was no point when I told him once." She said, voice getting smaller and smaller just like every other time she mentioned that wanker. 

"He laughed at you? Why?" Severus asked, tone too nonchalant not to be a little forced.

"I… I told him I wanted to go to college or night school and he… he laughed at me…" Severus leaned down and turned the radio off and fixed her with an expectant look. 

"Why would he do that? I think it's a brilliant idea, what would you want to study?" Severus asked immediately and her wary expression even as she watched him hopefully made him want to punch Vernon so hard he saw stars- again. 

"I… well, I know I'm not really going to be earning a lot of money anyway, not really, but… well, I've always sort of wanted to…" 

"Spit it out woman."

"There's some courses on at the college and I really want to do them." She said quickly and Severus stared at her. "I always wanted to be a florist or a baker…" she finally looked at him. "Go on then, laugh?"

"Why would I laugh. You're a brilliant baker and I know how good you are with flowers and all that." She blinked at him, clearly stunned.

"You… you think I could?"

"Why not? You can already do those things and I know you enjoy them, you just need a certificate to prove it. Do it." He urged and Petunia did something entirely unexpected. She burst into tears. "Er… did I say something wrong?" The weight of her flinging herself at him and her arms around his neck put that question to bed in an instant. 

"You- you really think I can do it?"

"I wouldn't lie to you, and I can try to help with the maths stuff for a business if you need it." He said and then added quickly, "Not that I think you will." 

She pulled away and smiled tearily, the little huff of a smile reassuring him that he hadn't said something completely stupid. 

"You wouldn't… you wouldn't mind if I had my own little business?"

"Why would I mind. Petunia, you're going to be my wife. I'm going to  _ get _ to tell people that my gorgeous amazing wife runs her own business."

"You know, most men… they'd take it as an insult."

"No they wouldn't, Ny," he'd adopted the nickname for her when he'd decided that 'Pet' sounded stupid and he couldn't erase Lily calling her sister 'Tuney' in that horrible teasing singsong tone from his memory. She seemed to like it. "Not the men  _ I _ call men and not arseholes, anyway." He added and Petunia let out a tiny laugh. "Where I come from it's a matter of pride that a bloke can provide,  _ of course it is _ , but what kind of husband would I be if I stopped you doing something you wanted to do?" 

She smiled sniffly

"You're… I never expected to have a husband who would… you know, let me work…"

" _ Let _ you? I'm not your father Ny, I don't  _ let _ you do anything." He almost laughed at his own voice when he realised what he'd said. 

"Since when are you a feminist?" She asked and he shrugged, astounded at his own words. He was old fashioned, he'd been raised that way, she knew that. She'd said she liked it about him, that he didn't pressure her to act like the girls in miniskirts screaming at bands on TV.

" _ Not a clue _ . But seriously, where I come from a wife who can't or won't work is a liability, Ny, times get hard and having a second income it's not… well, it's not like I can fall back on family money is it?" He wouldn't look at her as he said it, they both knew he was thinking of his mum's inability to do anything without magic. 

"No… I suppose not." She said eventually, touching his arm. 

**3 sept 1977**

"I am leaving right now," Severus snapped at his mother, "you are not going to stop me seeing  _ my fiance  _ on her birthday." He was surprised she was awake this early, she wasn't usually and it showed in state her hair was in.

"You will not go out of this house. You're grounded." Severus laughed harshly in her face.

"You don't have the power to stop me." He told her with a sneer.

"I am your  _ mother!" _

"Either I'm an of age  _ wizard _ who can and should use magic and come and go as he pleases or I'm a child to be grounded." Severus told her coolly, "you can't have it both ways." 

She glared at him, she'd been on at him to use more magic once she had finally got over herself and stopped giving him the silent treatment sometime last week. It hadn't been a relief. Everything he did; Severus, there's no need to boil the kettle  _ just _ spell the water hot. Severus, you don't need to write by hand just  _ charm a pen _ . 

Severus, could you  _ just summon the salt _ for me? Severus why are you driving when you can apparate? Severus, Seve _ rus _ ,  _ Severus… _ She was lucky he hadn't turned around and hexed  _ her _ silent. 

"You will be back-" he couldn't believe that now she was deciding to try and tell him what to do like she'd cared about disciplining him for the last seventeen years. If it hadn't been for his teachers at school and Doctor Evans he'd have been irredeemable long before he got the chance to sit his eleven plus. 

"I will be back when I'm  _ goddamned _ good and ready, and if you don't like it kick me out, you know I'm more than capable of looking after myself." He told her and he could almost hear the clang of the penny dropping behind her eyes that she had lost in the silence that followed.

Mum fixed him with a look like he had just forced a lemon into her mouth and made her chew but he was beyond caring. The only reason he was still here was because he wasn't old enough to sign for his own place yet, though he was sure dad or uncle Steve would have signed for him if he really did up and leave.

"Tell your girl a good one from me son," dad called from the living room as Severus stepped out in a suit to the car waiting in the driveway. Severus didn't know how much he'd heard of mum trying to stop him leaving and he didn't stick around to ask. He was going to spoil Petunia today. She deserved it.

He'd put a suit on and told Petunia to dress up pretty. He had a table booked for one and another for six and an entire day around them. She'd been wanting to go to York for ages, someone had told her it was  _ pretty  _ and when her birthday had rolled around it seemed the obvious choice. He'd asked Dr Evans if he and his wife wanted to come but they had more planned for Petunia tomorrow. A little birthday party with her friends and family that as far as he knew, she knew nothing about but Severus couldn't make because he was working overtime at the mill- he couldn't reasonably turn down the Sunday rates and was hoping to be able to drop in on her after work anyway.

Doctor Evans no longer set a curfew for the time Severus was to get Petunia home when they went out for the day and Severus was glad he'd somehow managed to earn that tiny bit of trust. It wasn't like he was going to roll back in with her at two in the morning anyway. The first time they had arrived back to the house in darkness Severus had been worried something had happened until Petunia had pointed out the doctor's car in the drive. He'd gone in with her anyway and she had shown him the note before he would leave.

_ Gone to bed early, dinner in the oven enough for two if you haven't eaten. Hope you had a nice day out today. _

It had been an odd feeling to have anyone trust him that much with their daughter and he'd promised himself he'd make sure he deserved it.

Petunia came down the stairs today in a beautiful red dress that had just enough frills to look classy without drawing the eye anywhere that would cheapen the effect and Severus nearly had a heart attack, he didn't dare look at doctor Evans for fear the man wouldn't let her leave the house dressed like that. He realised he was gaping as she pulled up the shawl self-consciously over her shoulder and hid behind the carefully set wave of hair that bounced just above her shoulder.

"You look… beautiful." She blushed furiously and Severus grinned. 

"Well… you did say to dress up." She said quietly and Severus held out a hand to her. 

"I did… and you did." He said as he pulled her into a  _ light _ kiss, well aware that her father was stood  _ right there _ and he didn't want to be disrespectful in the man's house.

"You two be good, and have fun," Mrs Evans said from the kitchen door and Severus tipped his head in her direction, mouthing a silent thank you.

"Yes, ma'am." She laughed and shooed them away even as doctor Evans returned to watching the morning news.

The drive over was nice, a few tapes in the deck kept Petunia humming happily and he was surprised there was not so much traffic for a Saturday morning. 

Halfway there Petunia leaned forward and turned the music off.

"Severus, where are we actually going?" She asked as they passed another roadsign and Severus smiled without taking his eyes off the road.

"You said you wanted to go to York, so we're going to York." He told her and she squeaked.

"Really?"

He nodded at the next road sign and took the turn. "Yup. Got a table at Betty's for you for afternoon tea at one." He added and the squeal turned into a shriek of delight.

"Oh Severus how  _ ever _ did you manage that?"

"I picked up the phone?" Severus said confused and Petunia prodded his shoulder amusedly.

"You know what I mean!" She said and Severus snickered.

"Yeah, I know. But literally, they were really nice about it when I rang up and asked if I could book." Severus said, shrugging. 

"How did you even know…? I've wanted to go to Betty's for years."

"I… may have heard York, looked it up and put two and two together… with a little help from your mum."

" _ My mum _ ! When?" 

"You were in your floristry class and I popped round and asked what was so special about York. She told me they took you and Lily once when you were younger?" He answered and Petunia nodded enthusiastically.

"They did and it was wonderful and  _ oh if you weren't driving I could kiss you _ !" 

"Save it for when we park up?" He asked with a cheeky grin and Petunia giggled almost hysterically. She was flushed with pleasure and excitement and Severus smiled to himself, he definitely owed Mrs Evans a bunch of flowers for the tip-off. 

It really was a wonderful afternoon and the weather held out beautifully for them as they meandered through the Shambles, wandered around the minster, and generally just explored the city. Severus ignored the funny looks he got from strangers and focused on Petunia. Petunia liked the little black cats on the houses, Severus liked how he could glance around and find something to feed his endless curiosity about the history of the city. It was amazingly freeing to be somewhere no one knew either of them and Petunia giggled at him and teased him about how cute he was reading the statue descriptions more than once and how he hadn't turned his radio on once. He wasn't sure what he did, but there was something about the way he reacted when all he did was scowl and stick his tongue out at her that seemed to make her really relax. He could probably guess, but he'd promised he wouldn't kill Vernon Dursley so he didn't ask.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, a few things i know might crop up in the comments:
> 
> Yes, Vernon used a pretty nasty slur (not *that* one, one with a lot of history in the UK) and Severus punched him for it (amongst other things), i didn't have it said outright because, well, duh! Ew. I strongly suggest not googling racist jam jar characters if you don't already know. I'm not going to apologise for Severus reacting like that, i'd have hit him a second time and left him for the tide. 
> 
> I realised way back early into this fic that i had a mental image of Tobias as a Windrush generation in this fic, that's why some of his speech seems to be a mix of generic northern and just a hint of Jamaican twang. I did it this way deliberately, I didn't want to be disrespectful to anyone by making the accent obvious and distracting and i don't hear him speaking Patois in my head. This fic is from Severus's point of view and his dad being Jamaican is just something he doesn't think about which leads me to my next point. This is not to Tobias from canon, by now that should have been abundantly clear. He's not a walking stereotypical abusive father, his relationship with his son is complicated by the past but mostly good. 
> 
> Personal anecdote:  
> I am mixed race, my grandparents on one side were part of that Windrush generation. I watched my mum go from being almost 'white passing' to very dark in summer and i do the same (seriously, my summer/post holiday foundation is four shades darker than my winter one) so it is entirely possible to tan that deeply and naturally without burning. I've only ever burned once and it wasn't under the English sun (it doesn't get hot enough)- on that note: i do not recommend getting your first bad sun burn in a country when you do most of your communication in a language you are heavily accented in and haven't spoken in over 10 years since you left school *and* it's their second language too.


End file.
